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tonks

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Noir G15

谁还没有个需要用到Protego的时候呢

谁还没有个需要用到Protego的时候呢

绯之徘徊

Tempora Mutantur, Nos et Mutamur in Illis

恰巧在521这样一个有纪念意义的日子完结,那么就祝他们长久地愉快相处吧~我个人觉得521比520更有意义,毕竟德语里,关系远才称呼“您”,亲密的人之间称呼“你”。

Chapter 14 New Year and Beyond (Part 2)

As we're getting close to the castle, I feel a twinge in my chest for ...

恰巧在521这样一个有纪念意义的日子完结,那么就祝他们长久地愉快相处吧~我个人觉得521比520更有意义,毕竟德语里,关系远才称呼“您”,亲密的人之间称呼“你”。

Chapter 14 New Year and Beyond (Part 2)

As we're getting close to the castle, I feel a twinge in my chest for no reason. I grab Severus' arm tighter, and he just gives me his trademark expression: his upper lip is curling! The git! At least he restrains himself from sarcastic remarks. I should take it as my consolation. Maybe it's high time to take advantage of my divided personalities and shelf the whole integrating thing for a while. Before I step into the castle, I draw in a deep breath, forfeit my cognition of the current identity, and say in a remarkably convincing tone, "I'm so excited to meet your friends, Shawn."

Judging from the twinkle in his dark eyes, he has understood my strategy and decided to play along. He leads me to the grand hall and gives me some brief introductions along the way as if he brings a real muggle date here. Being Severus, he keeps the tour short and dull, making Hogwarts less marvelous than it should be.

Professor McGonagall is clearly shocked when she sets eyes on me, "I thought you were joking about bringing a date, a muggle woman no less. Don't take it in the wrong way. You're both welcomed."

I shift my eyes between them, waiting to be introduced. Severus replies drily, "Well, this is Susiel Pond. As you can see, she is real. Susiel, this is Headmistress McGonagall."

I smile," Nice to meet you, Headmistress. Pray to forgive me. This is the first time I hear your name. Shawn seldom shares his other life with me. I'm so flatted he even invited me to this extraordinary party. May I say, your school is magnificent."

Professor McGonagall nods in a warm way, "Severus is a very private man and good at keeping secrets. I can tell you're a fine young lady from first sight. It's a pity I can't spend more time with you. Let Severus show you around. Again, welcome to Hogwarts, do enjoy yourself." With this, the Headmistress takes her leave.

Apart from the festival decoration, Hogwarts doesn't change much. Unlike the ever-changing muggle society, the wizardry world prefers permanent and honors heritage. I glance around and find many familiar yet strange faces, Professor Flitwick, Professor Sinistra, Kingsley, Harry, Hermione, the Weasley's, and some people from The Ministry of Magic. Great, as far as my eyes can reach, Remus is not here.

As my heart finally settles, a thought struck me: What I wouldn't give up to meet Alastor here. I miss my grumpy mentor every single day! He cared for me in his own way. Yet magic rule number 1: You can't bring back the dead.

I am lost in my contemplation when Severus whispers in my ear, "Looking for someone in particular?"

I pull a smile, "I am waiting for your introduction. It's social etiquette from where I belong."

He smirks, "You don't have to wait long."

Few students stay for the holiday, so it's not a crowed party, which means I have drawn considerable attention as a stranger in a red dress, not to mention Snape's date. I doubt he has ever brought a date willingly to any occasion. Wizards or muggles, human beings are equally curious and gossipy.

Molly is the first to approach us. By greeting Severus, she gets enough information about me to satisfy her curiosity. More people follow her lead. One may be fooled into thinking people really like Severus for that matter, but I surely know better.

After a while, I have been appropriately introduced to whomever cares to know me, and Severus has been "borrowed" away from me by his former colleagues. Needless to say, an interrogation awaits him. Those professors are anxious to squeeze more juicy details to entertain their dreary lives.

As much as I want to watch them annoying Severus, I'm not going to deprive the faculty of their rare amusement. After all, they may feel more comfortable to ask awkward questions without my presence, may even get an answer if Severus is really in a good mood.

Amused with the vivid picture in my head, I decide to check the buffet and make myself occupied. As always, the house-elves did a splendid job. I am idling around with a glass of fire whiskey in my hand when I feel the ear cuff becoming warm. It only means one thing: A werewolf is around. To play safe, I've left my wand at Severus' house. A muggle is not supposed to carry a wand.

 But I'm at Hogwarts, even Milla won't be crazy enough to attack me here, with all these witnesses. I have nothing to worry about. I clear my head and keep my pace, ignoring the now burning sensation.

"Dora." A hoarse voice calls behind me.

If it were a movie, what happened next would be shattered glass, stopped footsteps, stiffed shoulders, and possibly redden eyes, successively. It's not a movie, so I did no such thing. Instead, I keep moving at the same pace. I am far more mature to fall for a random call. Besides, I trust Severus' skill. As long as I wear the jewelry, there is no way a werewolf can detect me.

"Dora, stop. I know it's you." He doesn't give up, and I can sense him approaching, right behind me.

For he isn't about to do any harm, I'm not in physical danger. Thus, the alarming spell won't warn Snape.

"Dora." Now, he puts a hand on my bare shoulder. I have to stop. Swirling around, I glare at him with genuine anger and question him in a low but patronizing voice, "Excuse me, but do I know you?"

Seeing me stop, he withdraws his hand, "Dora, drop it, please."

Here he is, eyes fixed on me. He seems so sad. That naive Nymphadora was willing to sacrifice everything to ease his sorrow, to make him happy, yet failed miserably and ultimately. I am not her. I won't yield to those brown eyes. Instead, I look straight into his.

"You must have mistaken me for someone else, not someone dear to you, I gather. Or you just tried to hit on a woman with a pickup line even older than you?" I mock him with no mercy. From the pain on his face, I know that every word I said is a dagger in him. So, I do have learned something from Severus after all the time we spent together.

"Dora, you're dear to me, and..."

"People don't mistake a dear one." I cut him off harshly. His misery satisfies me greatly, but I need to get away from him now, cause Nymphadora is crying in the corner of my head, striving for taking control of the body.

"If you'll excuse me." I trot away, and he doesn't follow. I spot Severus in the far end of the hall and head to him as quickly as I can.

"Darling, where have you been? You won't believe it. A man hit on me with an ancient line!" I reach out for his arm and tell him what just happened with faked amusement.

Usually, he is not an advocator of showing affection in public, but this time he takes me into his arms and asks, "What happened?" Before I can answer, he said wryly, "Don't bother. Lupin is coming, for you, I assume."

Please don't push me away. Please don't suspect me! I am yelling inside.

Severus pulls away, releases me from his arms, but keeps a hand around my waist. His gesture makes me calm down a little. I turned around, facing Remus, but still cling to my date.  

Remus can't hide the disbelief on his face when he sees whom I am with. His eyes shift between Severus and me. None of us speaks.

Finally, Snape breaks the silence, "Lupin, my date just told me her encounter with a strange man. Well, I can't believe you managed to exceed your lower bound."

With Severus' presence, Remus composes himself and regains his mild manner, "My sincere apology, Severus. Your date reminds me of someone I hold dear."

"Forgive me if I can't associate her with anyone that might be dear to YOU." He drawls ironically.

Remus surely knows better than bickering with my date. He just ignores his insult and asks gently, "Would you please introduce us properly, Severus? It's not like we have new faces visiting Hogwarts every day."

"Remus Lupin, a professor at Hogwarts; Ms. Pond, MY date."

I almost chuckle on his perfunctory and possessive introduction. I feel wanted and loved every time Severus demonstrates his jealousy, possessiveness, and protectiveness, which was so rare in Remus' case.  

"I suppose Ms. Pond has a first name?" He seems to talk to Snape, but he is looking at me.

"Susiel, Susiel Pond. I'll appreciate it if you address me correctly next time." I just can't bear him calling me Dora one more time. That is a name used by my father, by someone supposed to love me, certainly not him.

"Duly noted, Ms. Pond." Remus is polite, as always.

"So, where is your date, Lupin? I am under the impression that you've found someone new to replace Nymphadora. Care to introduce her?" Severus just takes every opportunity to provoke him, and it works this time.

"My mate doesn't enjoy socializing with wizards or witches much, and she is not a replacement for anyone." Remus sounds distinctly colder at the mention of his mate.

"You do have a colorful life, Mr. Lupin. A lady's man, I may say." I just want to hurt him, because Nymphadora feels hurt.

At this moment, music starts, and people begin to dance.

Remus holds out a hand to me and invites, " May I have the honor? Severus, if you don't mind."

I am screaming inside! How dare he ask me for my hand? How dare he even come to talk to me?

"In fact, I do mind." "Sorry, I don't feel like dancing." Severus and I reject him in unison.

He doesn't retreat, "I insist. We don't want to make a scene, do we?"

He has a point. After all, I can't afford that he exposes my true identity in public. Reluctantly, I take his hand, "Just one dance, and you'll leave us alone?" Beside me, Severus lets out a humph.

"I promise." He leads me to the dancing floor.

We sway to the music, but I don't feel any joy dancing with him. Strangely, neither does Nymphadora.

"I know you have something to counter Milla's tracing mark, but that's not how I recognize you. Yes, I know who you really are, Dora, so don't try to deny it."

So, he knows it all the time! He knows his mate is hunting me. Nymphadora's sorrow drains all the strength in me. I am too tired to argue with him. In fact, I am too tired to do anything. All I want is the music ends, and I can flee from this place as quickly as possible and never return! Severus is right about me: I have an instinct of fleeing.

"You're dear to me, you still are, and I regret how things ended up that way. I'm truly sorry, Dora. I know you hate me, and you have every right to do so. I'm not asking for your forgiveness. I just want you to know that I didn't recognize you when it all happened. I was detoxifying from Wolfsbane at that time. When I transferred, I lost all the human consciousness, driving only by animal instincts. All I knew at that time was my pregnant mate was in danger."

"Are you happy, Mr. Lupin?" Suddenly, I find my peace. Listening to his narrative, it feels a story, werewolf, and all. They are surreal to my current life. As for Nymphadora, she finds her peace at the word pregnant. She has long known that a Metamorphmagus is close to sterile with humans, and there is zero chance with a werewolf.

"We are. What about you, with Severus?"

"I've found what I have been looking for so long."

We enjoy the rest of the song in complete silence, knowing we have said all that needed to be said.

As the last beat drops, Severus doesn't waste a second to pull me into his arms.

"So, what do you think?" He asks me while leads my footsteps. He is a passable dancer if you ask me.

"I'm not in love with him, and I never will, if that's what you are asking." I lean to him for support, "I just think of a suitable present for you."

"Which is?"

"A nicely typed referral letter. I'll change to another psychiatrist after you sign it."

"You can't possibly consider firing me is a present for me."

"Severus, I intend to stick to this identity, and I want you to participate in my current life. If you remain as my doctor, I have to send all my housekeepers away before you visit. I can't invite you as a date for my social events. I mean, if you want it too. I'm not pushing you to anything serious."

"I have never considered a public relationship with Susiel Pond. I am so much older, and I am rubbish at relationships. But if It's something that isn't completely out of the realm of possibility for you, then I'd be lying if I said it was out of the realm of possibility for me." He is bubbling nonsense, which is adorable.

"Is that a yes?"

"I am not saying no."

I pause the dance and stand on tiptoe to kiss my git on the mouth.

We've never exchanged the L word, yet I feel content. Maybe with Severus, I don't need a declaration or commitment to make this relationship work.

Severus doesn't know that time is always on the Metamorphmagus' side, and as we mutual, we can die in the shape we desire.

I shall die in the shape that I live with him.

---------------------------------FIN--------------------------

Milla就是个工具人,懒得帮她想设定-v-||| 虽然我跳船,也还是有一只脚固定在RL/NT上的。只要不是终于原著,非得安排RL离开怀孕的NT,非得让他们倒下的文,我都爱,最爱AU。NT的年上配对,作者只要能自圆其说,让感情有可信度,都是我真爱:)

绯之徘徊

【授权翻译】-见不得光的秘密(Her Dirty Secret)

摘要:

Tonks中意Remus,所以Snape就想要得到Tonks——而Severus想要的东西总能得手
不过,Tonks是不是对Remus恋恋不忘?Hermione又是怎么参了一脚?

译者注:

我非常喜欢的一篇SS/NT作品,作者是Jaxon,原文链接如下:https://archiveofourown.org/works/10791687?page=2&show_comments=true&view_full_work=false#comment_293647783...

摘要:

Tonks中意Remus,所以Snape就想要得到Tonks——而Severus想要的东西总能得手
不过,Tonks是不是对Remus恋恋不忘?Hermione又是怎么参了一脚?

译者注:

我非常喜欢的一篇SS/NT作品,作者是Jaxon,原文链接如下:https://archiveofourown.org/works/10791687?page=2&show_comments=true&view_full_work=false#comment_293647783,作者行文风格非常独特,建议阅读原文体验。已获得作者授权。首发AO3,这里的标题修改了。我自己在写的小说里,有些设定和情节受到了这篇文的启发。

他不知道她为什么会对他有兴趣。
有时候,他甚至不确定她有兴趣。不过,他知道自己为什么对她有兴趣。因为Lupin。这个理由相当狭隘、孩子气,恶意满满,但是对Severus来说足够了。
狼人在她身边试探徘徊了很久,可一旦她表明心意,他却瞬间退缩。理由是“太老、太穷、太危险。”
然后就此离去。真是个懦夫。
正中Severus下怀。
*************************************************************************************
“我和他相同年纪,”坐在空荡荡的厨房里,他平静地说,“从小也是一贫如洗。”
“你的意思是?”Tonks眼眶发红,端着的茶已经凉了。
魔杖一挥,他隐去了她手中的茶杯,召唤了两个高脚杯。他倒了满满两杯火焰威士忌,端起自己的那杯,“敬勇气,”说完,他一饮而尽,又倒了一杯。
“你觉得自己很勇敢?”
“我也有伤疤。”他依旧盯着她。“如果你喜欢危险……”他没说完,而是卷起了袖子,黑魔标记印在他苍白的肌肤上,万般狰狞。
**************************************************************************************
Lupin弃之敝履的,Severus甘之如饴;只要她还愿意,他就不会放弃。她高潮的时候从不会叫他的名字,但她的发色却如彩虹般轮番变换,他为此着迷,百看不腻。
他不是男友,不是伴侣,也不会是丈夫,对她来说,他只是一个肮脏的秘密。在门厅厮混、在图书馆书架间偷情,从来没有耳畔的甜言蜜语,也没有对未来的长久承诺。
这些都不是她想要的,至少,不想从他身上获取。
她第一次在性爱中变换形体时,他惊叹道:“你该多用用这个天赋。”
“Severus Snape,地窖里的老蝙蝠,迷恋靴子的变态。”
“你对我所知甚少。”他神情阴郁地套着裤子,“考虑一下吧。”说完,他穿上了长袍。
*********************************************************************************************
后来,他不知道是自己拉着她坠入了黑暗,还是她引领他走向了光明。时间流逝,急促的厮混转换为缠绵的亲吻,挑逗的低语替代了空白的沉默。最终,她接受了他的提议,他则报之以激情。
“这个词太蠢了。”他不屑一顾。
“本来就该是个蠢词。”
“扫兴的东西。”
“只是一个词而已。考虑一下吧。”她觉得他暴躁的态度非常可笑,“为你的安全着想。”
“我能管好自己。”
“我可以变成任何人,”她警告他说,“任何人。你永远猜不到。比如说Bellatrix阿姨。”
他哼了一声,“太扫兴了。”
“你从来没幻想过?”Tonks看上去很惊讶,“那么,是不是Cissy?”
他平视着她,“你真以为Lucius会让Narcissa赤裸地跪在我脚旁,引诱我去……我也不知道引诱我做什么。”他满怀恶意地冲她一笑,“我搞不清楚你们这些疯狂的Black女人们脑子里在想些什么。”
她的床上功夫让他最终屈服于她的建议,乞求她的原谅。“傻瓜,”他笑着说,躺在床上气喘吁吁,“看来我再也没办法在新生训话中用这个词了。”
在一次次的性爱中,他尝尽了所有的食死徒和他们的女人。每一次,Tonks都看着他的脸。他依旧不知道这是自己黑暗的镜像,还是这个年轻的女人用其巧妙的方式嘲讽他曾经信仰的一切。
他不在乎,几乎如此。
月月复年年,战争来又去;逝者长已矣,存者且偷生。Tonks和Severus分分合合,聚聚散散,就像磁铁的两极,相斥又相吸。最终,真相大白,他们携手从废墟中重生。
没人比他更为惊讶。
尽管她纵容了他的古怪性癖,可她从没叫过他的名字。Lupin的巨大阴影依旧笼罩着他们快速发展的关系。他和Severus友好握手,向Nymphadora表示祝贺,一如既往地平静克制。Severus注意到了她看着他的样子,于是那天晚上,他毫无怜悯地索取了她。他不愿意看向她的眼睛,害怕在其中发现狼的影子。
他们大吵了一架,都怪那该死的庆功宴会!Nymphadora坚持要去参加,缅怀逝去的战友,而他完全不想到场,那些痛苦过往又有什么值得回忆?最后,他还是顺了她的意,一同出席。尽管他满怀牢骚,一直闷闷不乐,但还是勉强熬过了前半程。没想到Potter成了他的救星,他带着他幻影移形到了格里莫广场,又回到派对上,准备代替Severus向Tonks道歉。她出现的时候,他已经在喝第三瓶奥格登酒了。
“你在这里干什么?”
他猛地扬起头,满面疑惑。“你是……?”
“傻瓜。”
他们有好几年没玩这出了,但他还记得规则。他嘴唇微扬,又喝了一口琥珀色的酒。“轮遍了所有食死徒,现在换正义联盟了?好在你没选择Dumbledore。”他上下打量了一番,点头赞道,“就今晚的庆典来说,是个合理的选择。”他指了指满架藏书,“你打算符合主题?”
“你醉得有多厉害?”
“办事没问题,”他说着,放下杯子,示意她过来。几乎不用催促,她就坐在了他的大腿上,手指穿过他的头发。“你最好能让我忘记喝酒,”他将双唇压向她的脖颈,低语着,熟练地解开了她的上衣。她向后微仰,露出无暇的肌肤,呻吟着。她的声音让他的身体微麻,像触电一样。
他要了她一次又一次,她热情如火,刺激他冲上一波波的巅峰。他向来不习惯道歉,认错的话语难以出口,他的歉意用行动表示。他紧紧拥住她还在微颤的身体,迫切地想要看到她如彩虹般变换的发色。可是她不愿意那样做,不想破坏现在的伪装。他抱着她上楼,来到他们曾经同眠过的床上,就是这张床,陪伴他们度过了战争中最黑暗的时光。他吻在她的唇上,和她做爱。
“我爱你,”她在他耳畔轻声说道。震惊于她的话语,他离开了她的身体。她的双手环住他的脖子,紧紧地搂着他。
“你确定是我?不是他?”
“是你,Severus,”说完,她深深地吻了他。
他没有在她的眼中寻找狼的踪影。既然她将爱意说出口,他就选择相信。
“我不该说出来的,”她一边呢喃一边亲吻他的下颌,“这只会让事情更复杂。”
“不会的,”他翻身将她压在身下,亲密无间,“再说一次。”
“我爱你。”
“说出我的名字,”他急切地说,嗓音嘶哑。
她笑了,眼中闪烁着愉快的光芒,“我爱你,Severus。”
“再说一次。”
“Severus,我爱你。”
他们已经在一起若干年,然而这一晚,他仿佛才第一次感受到她的碰触。
清晨醒来,她已离去,阳光让他头痛欲裂。房间里满是欲望过后的陈腐腥甜,他打开窗,走进了浴室。然后,没和Potter打招呼,他就幻影移形离开了——回去工作,履行他的日程。
他送了花,点了外卖。她略感困惑,“你这是在道歉?”
“我为什么要道歉?”
“为你昨晚的行为。”
他皱起眉头,“你后悔了?”
“我很遗憾你没留下来,”她握住他的手,十指紧扣,“而且你在的时候也一直闷闷不乐,牢骚不断。”
“但是,你不后悔你说过的话,对吧?”他认真地追问。
“不后悔。”这下,她也皱起眉,“彼此间开诚布公非常重要,”话没说完,他就拥她入怀,用深吻打断了她。
*****************************************************************************************************
从此之后,她再也没有为他变幻过外形,可他依然求婚了。几个月前,他根本不相信她会接受,可现在他信心满满,确认无疑。她再也没说过“我爱你”,但是他无需再确认。
就算他对他们之间关系的变化有疑惑,也没有表现出来。他以为事情本该如此,成年人之间就是这样。不是所有关系都是每天激情满满,夜夜互诉衷肠。没必要大声宣告,一切尽在不言中。她陪在他身旁,这就够了。
他们盛装相伴,携手宣誓。看着欢聚一堂的嘉宾,他和她交换只有彼此知道意义的笑容——很多面孔曾在他们深夜的游戏中出场,这是他俩独享的秘密。
“我很遗憾,Hermione” Potter的声音很低,只比Granger的抽泣高那么一点点,“我以为他和Tonks只是玩玩而已。我以为只要你表白……”
“我表白了啊。我说了爱他。”
听到这句话,他的心跳停了一拍。


绯之徘徊

Tempora Mutantur, Nos et Mutamur in Illis

Chapter 13 Blood Magic

Nymphadora seemed a little bit perplexed as he broke the kiss all of a sudden, and then it just took one glance at his face that she realized the reason.

With one hand still at the nape of his neck, she withdrew the one holding the cuff to her mouth and licked it with her still...

Chapter 13 Blood Magic

Nymphadora seemed a little bit perplexed as he broke the kiss all of a sudden, and then it just took one glance at his face that she realized the reason.

With one hand still at the nape of his neck, she withdrew the one holding the cuff to her mouth and licked it with her still bleeding tongue till one half was covered with dark red. Then she lifted it to him. "Your turn." There was no fear or aversion in her voice, which made him astonished.

"I am no stranger to dark arks, maybe not as skilled as you are, but I enjoyed the resonance in my blood as much as you did." She looked into his eyes with knowing and acceptance in her own, "And in case you didn't notice, I'm not the one who broke it in fear."

"Blood magic is a taboo in most wizardry communities." Snape murmured in amazement. He still vividly remembered Lily's disgust at his fondness for dark arts, which inevitably led to the termination of their friendship."And given what happened, I'd say it's for good reasons." I reacted like a thirsty vampire intending to consume you.

"As far as I am concerned, what just happened is you trying to protect me with blood magic." Now she sounded a little bit offended. As if reading his mind, she continued wryly, "I might have fought FOR the light, but not completely WITH it. Severus, you don't know me well enough, and I'm sorry if I somehow misled you into thinking me as a white lily."

Was that jealous he detected? It would be a lie if Snape denied that he was glad that Nymphadora was also an insecure and jealous type, just like himself. Maybe they did have more in common than he thought. "Don't take it wrong, but I really can't associate you with any flower." He retorted, while took the cuff from her hand. He pulled her into his arms again, hold her tight, and rested his head on her shoulder. He just didn't want her to spot the joy in his eyes, cause he wasn't ready for this, to have a woman who could understand him more than he ever dreamed of.

"Good, cause I am not, and never will be." She breathed into his ear, "I also insist on having your blood on the jewelry so that the alarming spell can work both directions." Feeling the slight flinch of his body, she purred softly, "Told you. I'm no stranger."

The wicked witch didn't even bother to hide her complacency, and Snape felt obliged to give her credit for her competent knowledge on ancient runes since he had deliberately inscribed that spell as inconspicuous as possible, which enabled him to know the accurate location if Nymphadora was in danger again.    

He signed, "I wouldn't think otherwise." This time, he didn't try to hide his admiration."Care to join me together to finish the ritual?" He let go of her and drew his wander.

"Gladly." She smirked, using his exact word.

Snape cast a nonverbal spell to cut a tiny incision in his ring finger and dribbled blood over the cuff until it was all covered. On the count of three, they muttered the paternoster in unison, and golden lights ejected from their crossed wander tips directly to the jewelry in his palm. Illuminated by the lights, the cuff absorbed the blood covering it. In a few seconds, there was no trace of any blood, only a shiny silver ear cuff left.

"Allow me." He tucked the locks behind her left ear and gently placed the cuff on her auricle. It fitted just perfectly.

Once the jewelry settled, Nymphadora felt a warm sensation rushed all over her, and an intangible rhythm indicating the very existence of the man whose blood now mingled with hers. Now she could understand Remus more, for if his bonding ritual had a similar effect on him as Snape's blood magic on her, it was hard to resist. It felt like an anchor, which made a drifter stable.

"I was planning to buy you a present in Rome, yet nothing could compare..."

"I'd prefer your presence to your present." He cut off bluntly.

"What's your plan for New Year's? I'll be back then." She supplied hopefully.

Hesitantly, he replied, "Headmistress always invites me over to Hogwarts for the New Year's Gala."

"And you are not going to invite me? They always encourage guests to bring a plus-one and welcome muggles. At least they did the last time I attended." Nymphadora inquired with an arched eyebrow.

With an equally arched eyebrow, he challenged her, "Given the attendees, I doubt you will go with me even if I invited." I don't think you want to be in the same room with the resident Defense Against the Dark Arts Professor, and you know he will be there for sure. But oddly enough, he had never brought his mate after you left. Out of respect or guilty? More like the latter.

"Are you asking?"

"Are you going?


绯之徘徊

Tempora Mutantur, Nos et Mutamur in Illis

设计这个礼物花了我很久很久,所以这章更新得比较晚。

这章后半段是受到了<Beneath a Moonless Sky>这首歌的启发,也从里面引用了几句歌词,大爱这首歌,也特别喜欢这章里的SS。所以本来准备12章完结的,现在会多拖几章。

有位亲爱的(也许是唯一的)读者鼓励我写亲昵片段,所以做了尝试,请欣赏解剖学视角的描写,我尽力了。

知道这个CP很冷,不过还是期望能有更多人留言,我都会回复哒

Chapter 12 Christmas Present

Snape had to admit...

设计这个礼物花了我很久很久,所以这章更新得比较晚。

这章后半段是受到了<Beneath a Moonless Sky>这首歌的启发,也从里面引用了几句歌词,大爱这首歌,也特别喜欢这章里的SS。所以本来准备12章完结的,现在会多拖几章。

有位亲爱的(也许是唯一的)读者鼓励我写亲昵片段,所以做了尝试,请欣赏解剖学视角的描写,我尽力了。

知道这个CP很冷,不过还是期望能有更多人留言,我都会回复哒

Chapter 12 Christmas Present

Snape had to admit that Nymphadora made an excellent point. It was illegal to hunt down werewolves in the absence of good reasons after the war.

Thank you, Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures!

He couldn't provide a good reason without the exposure of an undead Auror, and he certainly wouldn't jeopardize his proud record of successfully-avoiding-Azkaban by conviction for murdering a werewolf, not to mention the werewolf in question was Lupin's mate. Entangling with death eaters sounded like a delightful recreation comparing to dealing with a vindictive dark creature.

All things considered, he settled for keeping Nymphadora safe. As long as she wouldn't encounter another attack, he could be a happy man. Being a former Defense Against the Dark Arts professor and Death Eater, Severus Snape did know his way with dark arts, as well as how to counter them. Besides, he also had a few associates who could offer whatever knowledge he lacked at a reasonable price.

A few purchases from Knockturn Alley and several owl-mail exchanges got him all he needed. The Potions Master was confident of his skills in alchemy and inscription. If Moody could benefit his protegee with an artifact after his tragic departure, Snape believed that he was capable of providing equal protection, at least. After all, he got one small advantage - still breathing.

Werewolf 's tracing magic might trump the concealing ability of Metamorphmagus, but he would be dammed if he let it trump the determination of the Double-Agent-Who-Survived.

He'd checked on Nymphadora frequently but only stayed for two nights since the full disclosure. It required lots of research and experiments for this artifact to be a Christmas present.

He stayed for the night on the day he finished it. It was five days before Christmas.

"What's your plan for Christmas?" He asked as casually as he could manage.

"A trip to Rome with Matt." Before Snape made any response, she added rapidly, "Matt Pond, Susiel's only family left. He's a troubled young man, basically lives in a private rehabilitation center. I made a pact when I took her identity. You see, Metamorphmagus cultivate our abilities by impersonating human beings, and it doesn't work when we temporarily borrow. When one lives another individual's life, one also shoulders the owner's responsibilities, and Matt is mine."

"Then I'd better give you the present now." He Apparated to his house and back with a small box, neatly wrapped in midnight blue paper decorated with silvery constellations.

She carefully opened the box and found a tiny ear cuff in it. Illustrating the symbol of Andromeda constellation, it was made of silver, covered with thickly dotted exceptional runes, and studded with three gemstones. An amethyst symbolized Alpha Andromedae, its brightest star, while for Gamma Andromedae, a colorful binary and a popular target for amateur astronomers, was a tourmaline, and a garnet resembled Beta Andromedae which was a red giant with the color visible to the naked eye.

From her Auror training, Nymphadora was fully aware of what function the jewelry had: silver for anti-werewolf, runes for concealing incantations, and three gemstones for healing, enhancement, and protection. It was a masterpiece and extremely powerful. Yet she treasured it for another reason. Snape had crafted it to the constellation that shared the same name with her mother, Andromeda, who suffered the most through her only child's tragic marriage and consequent leaving.   

She held the ear cuff close to her heart and closed her eyes as if feeling the intangible connection with her dear mother. She missed her so much.

Hate to break the aura, but he always did what he must. "Still missing one ingredient to completion. Your blood is required," he said gingerly, "preferably from the tongue tip."  

Bridging the distance between them, Nymphadora put her arms around his neck and pecked his cheek affectionately, "Severus, will you do the honor?"

"Gladly," he held her waist, pulling her closer, and placed a deep kiss on the lips.

She explored his mouth with her sweet tongue, soft tip brushing his teeth gently, then lingering in the space between his incisors. Tongue to tongue, chasing, entangling, and intertwining, with sensation.

Finally, he placed one hand on the back of her head to steady her, and bit the tip tenderly, just enough to taste a trace of blood. Her blood. Strangely, he was aroused by the taste, sweet, metallic, mingling with exotic magic, and full of pure energy.

He could feel that with every beat of her heart, the blood was pumped out to the artery, flowing to her whole body, and then repeated the everlasting circulation. The music of the pulse, the singing in her veins, and the resonance it trigged in his own system composed a ravishing symphony that drove him crazy. The moment felt like an eternity. He wanted more. He wanted her.

Lost in the entrancement, he deepened the bite unconsciously and sucked harder and harder. Instead of withdrawing, she held him tighter and moaned with joy. It was until he noticed a trail of blood dribbling down from the corner of her mouth that he realized what he had done.

Blood Magic. People never change. You are who you are, a Death Eater addicted to the dark arts. You always know that, don't you? Now, she knows.  

The moment was gone. Snape pulled away in panic, afraid of what she might react.


绯之徘徊

Tempora Mutantur, Nos et Mutamur in Illis

Chapter 11 The Mate

There was a first time for everything.

The first time he slept with Nymphadora; the first time she looked into his eyes during sex, brown met ...

Chapter 11 The Mate

There was a first time for everything.

The first time he slept with Nymphadora; the first time she looked into his eyes during sex, brown met black, from uncertain to rejoiced; the first time she whispered his name to his ear; the first time they spent the night together.

Nymphadora woke up in the morning and found Snape gone, leaving a note at the nightstand, "Got to work, breakfast in the kitchen. Send me a message if you feel like another home-visit."

She smiled and texted him, "Please drop by after work. Join me for dinner." 

"I didn't think you are the cooking type. Impressed, I'd say, although the food did look a bit creative." Now they were sitting on the carpet, face to face, each with a glass in hand. It was rather cozy by the fireplace after enjoying Nymphadora's cooking.

"I prefer improvising when it comes to cooking, learned some tricks during my drifting time in the muggle world. I was quite a drifter before the whole Susiel Pond situation. So, where are we now? Oh, Milla."

"You see, curiosity killed the cat, and it nearly finished me off. I tracked Remus down on a full moon and confronted by his angry mate. She knew me all the time and resented me for occupying most of her mate's time. True to the legend, werewolf is a jealous species, as well as a protective one-"

"Lupin has no right to snatch your wand; he might as well kill you himself." He snapped a remark.

"Severus, the truth is, I don't know which spell I was about to cast at that time. I did have enough hatred and malice in me for the Unforgivable. Remus only acted on instinct to protect his mate. Nothing wrong from his part. I guess I did want her dead back then, vise verse. " She said softly and gave a reluctant smile.

Again! Defending the werewolf!

"I owe Mad-Eye my life. I would never live to tell you the story if it were not for his relics, you know, no wand, open throat, and all. He left most of his enchanted artifacts to me in his will, and I always wore a bracelet as a remembrance. Lucky for me, it contained a teleport spell, which got me back to my mum's. " She said in an even tone. Her lips curled into a sad smile when mentioning her late mentor, with tears welling up. Nymphadora, Alastor Moody's favorite and protegee, he watched over her even beyond the grave.

And for that, I'll always be grateful to Moody. Snape asked thoughtfully, "Was it her back in the woods?"

"Alas, werewolf 's tracing magic trumped the concealing ability of my kind, for now." She sighed in defeat, "Metamorphmagus is not as rare as people think. It's just next to impossible to track adult Metamorphmagus if they don't want to be found."

"Aren't you an adult now?" Snape arched an eyebrow.

"Not by the standard of my kind, far from adequate. Remember the time I couldn't morph at all when I was down? I was such a child back then, silly and naive, affected heavily by emotions. It won't happen now. Long story short, she marked me as her prey with magic I can't counteract now. She can sense me within a certain distance. I'm not quite sure exactly how close it is, but unfortunately, our paths crossed more often than I'd like recently." She drained her glass in one shot, "full disclosure, the end."

"Do you want her dead now?"Snape inquired. He needed to know her attitude before taking action. He didn't fancy the idea of a dark creature hunting Nymphadora.

She thought for a long while. "I guess not." As if reading his mind, she added quickly, "don't get me wrong, it's not what you think, for Remus or something. I did want to kill her years ago. Yet I couldn't, mainly for Remus. But now, it was just like things in another life, too remote for me to care much. I don't want to risk the present for the past. Promise you won't do anything to her, ok? I'll avoid all the night shooting on the full moon. I can't bear the thought of losing Y, losing my psychiatrist." The concern in her voice was too deep to be mistaken.

Then I can bear the thought of losing you? Sorry, I won't make a promise that I have no intention to keep. His upper lip was curling, "Let's just hope your paths won't cross again."

She knew him well enough to understand it was the best she could get on this topic.



Notes:I'm neither comfortable nor good at writing detailed sex. Like I said at the very beginning, English as a second language. So, if I did try to write sexual scenes, with my limited vocabulary, all you read would be an article in anatomy. No one would like THAT. To spare my embarrassment, as well as your torture, I'd like to kindly ask you unleash your Imagination for the night event those two shared.
They made up. Nymphadora found herself in Severus' eyes, so naturally, their relationship moved to a new level.
Just to make sure I expressed the above clearly:)
Your comment will make my day. I'd like to know what you think about it.

绯之徘徊

Tempora Mutantur, Nos et Mutamur in Illis

Chapter 10 Full Disclosure

Snape received a message from a certain patient requiring a long-due home visit. Nymphadora was in her convalescence, so she followed his advice: No Apparate nor unnecessary morph. She barely walked out of her villa.

She sat on the wool carpet before the fireplace in the...

Chapter 10 Full Disclosure

Snape received a message from a certain patient requiring a long-due home visit. Nymphadora was in her convalescence, so she followed his advice: No Apparate nor unnecessary morph. She barely walked out of her villa.

She sat on the wool carpet before the fireplace in the living room when Snape arrived at 20:30, who was pleased to find Nymphadora instead of Ms. Pond.

He took an armchair across from her and noticed how small and fragile she was in her real shape. With those permanent scars, she seemed like a ragged doll, innocent, yet broken beyond repair. No known magic could heal damages caused by dark creatures. He drowns in sorrow while burnt with rage simultaneously.

"So, full disclosure, are we?" He brought it up without small talks. Half a month had passed, together with his patience.

"May I offer you a drink first? I know you prefer Absolut Vodka."

"I prefer to stay sober during our conversation." Although he was touched that she had noticed and remembered his preference, which he never told her in person.

"No alcohol, then, tea? Coffee? Cocoa?" she offered.

"Nymphadora-" He warned her in his best threatening tone.

"Don't blame me for trying, Severus. Should have tried in a Veela form though, silly me." She retorted in a drawling voice. There was no trace of hoarseness in it, so she must have changed her instrument.

"Since you mentioned, why don't we start with your scars?"

"If they bother you so much, I can morph them away. Tiny changes, no burden at all." She said casually, with eyes fixed on her bare feet.

"Look at me."

"No, thank you. Never make eye contacts when an accomplished Legilimens wants something from you."

"Let's settle this once and for all because I do not enjoy repeating myself. I never cared what shape you chose, and I never will. Choose whatever you see fit, just not on my behalf. Is that clear now? "

"Noted, sir." Nymphadora looked up to meet his black eyes. Her mischievous tone and the choice of words reminded Snape of her Hogwarts days in his Potions classroom. Somethings would never vanish. They just hid deep down, waiting to be found again.

"Still waiting for the answer." He prompted.

"Werewolf mauled, obviously." Noticing the scowl on his face, Nymphadora added, "See for yourself. I'll summon the relevant memories to the surface, but don't dig deep or-"

" -one may not like the findings." They said it in unison and smiled at each other with warmth in the eyes.

"I recall that you just acknowledged me as an established Legilimens?" He arched an eyebrow as a challenge.

"Accomplished, to be accurate." She mocked him to cover her uneasiness, yet failed.

Snape knew what it felt like to relive the worst memories and how agonized it would be. As much as he appropriated that Nymphadora was willing to share her deepest fear, he didn't fancy the idea of her suffering.

"You don't have to. I'll believe what you say." He held his gaze into her dark brown eyes.

Suddenly, emotions flowed over her eyes. Sadness, fear, fury, insanity, agony, all the negative ones together, turned her eyes into an abyss, drawing Snape down. She shut her eyes and said weakly, "I can't, or it will become too real for me to bear."

"Would you mind if I have a drink before we start?" she asked apologetically.

"Take your time. My evening schedule is fully open."

Nymphadora raised to her feet and left. She returned with a glass of Baileys in her hand before long.

Perched on the armrest of his chair, she drank from the glass sip by sip in silence. Finally, as if she had summoned all the courage required, she drained the glass in one shot.

"May I hold you when you do it?" Her voice quivered, barely audible.

The question irritated Snape beyond ˈmeasure. Why she had to act so polite now, like they were just acquaintances and all those midnight visits had never happened?

"Technically, you and Nymphadora are mere acquaintances. You have slept with Bellatrix, Narcissa, Hermione, and other nameless women, not HER. You two are not intimate, no physical contact at all." 

"She invited me to perform a Legilimency on her of her own accord. That is a higher level of intimacy."

"Yet she had to ask for permission before she hugs you. A twisted pair."

Without warning, Snape reached out, grabbed her by the waist, and pulled her into his arm.

She gasped at the sudden, then laid her head against his neck.

"No need to ask." He breathed to her ear. He didn't realize precisely how skinny she was until he held her tight. All magic came at a price. The persistent morph was draining her. He could feel her tension at first, and was pleased to see her at ease now.

"Thank you, Severus. I think I am ready."

He drew his wand out. Before casting the spell, he gingerly traced the scar on her throat with the empty hand. She was shaking with fear at his touch. Lacing her icy-cold fingers, Snape calmed her, "They are just memories from the past. They can't harm you unless you let them. I'll be as gentle as possible. I promise."

She nodded against his chest.

Legilimens!

As a trained Auror, she was familiar with editing memory for presentation. For some reason, she had muted them.

The scenes Snape saw were organized and chronological, but nonetheless confusing.

It was a full moon. A werewolf was chasing Nymphadora in the woods. 

Nymphadora drew out her wand aiming to attack. A bigger werewolf-Snape recognized it as Lupin-jumped out and snatched her wand, and the impact of the blow knocked her off balance.

Nymphadora fell to the ground, and the first werewolf jumped on her, mauled her with sharp claws, sending blood everywhere. 

A silver light covered Nymphadora, and she disappeared.

Andromeda was attending her dying daughter.

The show's over.

"It doesn't make sense. I am under the impression that werewolf mates for life and will protect the chosen mate at all costs after the bonding ritual. You married him."

"Werewolf expert, are we? Pity, you jumped to the wrong conclusion that marriage equals bonding ritual. I was the cost, not the mate."

No words in the world could describe the bitterness in her voice, and comforting was not Snape's strong suit. He just held her tighter.

Nymphadora pulled away, retreated to the carpet, and wrapped her arms around herself. "I guess it's all my fault. I had it coming."

"Forgive me for not seeing so. Do enlighten me!" He just could not hold his tongue. The werewolf married her, yet he intended to murder her. Yes! In his opinion, disarming her in a werewolf attack equals committing the murder himself! How could she really think it was her fault!

"How much do you know about Metamorphmagus?"

"Not much, except for the bits you shared. Why?"

"Similar to werewolf, Metamorphmagus is not human. We shouldn't pretend to be one. You're WHO you are. We're WHAT we are."

"We are who we are. He is what he is!" Snape corrected her automatically. He couldn't tolerate that she still thought her and Lupin as "we".

Instead of entangling with the pronoun, Nymphadora continued, "I was relatively young back then and tried so hard to fit in, pretending I was a normal witch with special gifts. While Remus was struggling to stay with his human side, denying the inside wolf. I felt close to him."

"He was not Young. " Snape spat.

"To be fair, he did tell me a million times that-"

"Oh yeah? It didn't stop him from marrying you, did it? " Snape interrupted her irritably. Couldn't she just stop defending Lupin?

"Like I just said, Remus was also struggling at that time," she signed deeply and lost in thought for a while, "I lost him long before our wedding, when the headmaster sent him to the pack. Running with his kind made him finally realize werewolf is not human. They are different in a broad spectrum. The truth shook him to the core. You know, he spent more years pretending than I did, and he couldn't just give it all up. It's so hard for him, especially when he met Milla, his mate. He felt ambivalent, I guess."

So, he married you and used the marriage as his anchor in the wizardry society. How typical! A hypocrite indeed!

"I found out Milla eventually. I really shouldn't have. Being a Metamorphmagus sometimes is a curse. Have you ever wondered why I can wear a shape that people desire the most? Because I can visualize it in their eyes on occasions, orgasm included." The last two words squeezed out through gritted teeth.

The truth was out there.

"One shall never start looking as one may not like the findings."

That's how she found out Lupin's mate. Oh, the trauma, deep to the bone.

That's why she never looked into my eyes during intercourses. 

That's the reason she transformed into Lily. But she was WRONG!

Nymphadora was crying with her head hidden in her arms. This was the first time Snape saw her letting all her defense down, vulnerable as a child.

He bridged the gap between them and bent down to stroke her hair. He had witnessed countless emotional breakdowns in his office, yet still felt awkward comforting people.

Should I hold her? Or, should I just leave and give her some privacy?

"Emotional breakdown is not good for a convalescent patient. Let's call it a night. Anything I can do for you before I go?" He forced these words out, patting her thin back gently.

Without looking up, she stretched forth a bony hand and grabbed his suit, "Stay."

This time, Nymphadora didn't ask.


绯之徘徊

Tempora Mutantur, Nos et Mutamur in Illis

Chapter 9 Cover up

Chapter Text

Rage rushed over him. Snape wavered over shouting at Nymphadora for her idiocy, strangling Lupin with bare hands for hurting her like THIS...

Chapter 9 Cover up

Chapter Text

Rage rushed over him. Snape wavered over shouting at Nymphadora for her idiocy, strangling Lupin with bare hands for hurting her like THIS, or walking out the door and leaving her to her own device. Each seemed so tempting right now.

"Don't say or do something you will regret later. Be patient. She is a patient and my patient." Dr. Prince was always the wise and rational one.

He followed his advice, took a deep breath, and did none of the above. Instead, he put a detection spell on her again for a thorough examination, while avoided her face deliberately. She could have maintained the last morph and fooled you, but she trusts you enough to reveal all. Just keep that in mind and focus on the priority! 

The alleviated DIC was the silver lining.

"You know, if my face is too unpleasant for you even to comment..." she broke the uncomfortable silence with a weak, hoarse voice.

Of all the things possible in the world she could have said, she chose the one trigged our last tension. The woman literally has a twisted sense of humor. Although still angry, he could hardly suppress a mild smile and turned his eyes to meet hers. But they didn't make there as they stopped at a healed laceration on her throat.

LUPIN HAD TORN HER THROAT OPEN! That was the last straw. To hell with restraint!

"Give me one good reason. Convince me why I shouldn't send an owl to the Ministry of Magic immediately to report a werewolf offense, attempted murder to be accurate. I may need a perfect one." He said coldly and slowly, every word with viciousness.

"Patient-doctor confidentiality." She supplied calmly, though barely audible.

Her calmness irritated him no end. "I am willing to trade my practicing license for Lupin's one-way ticket to AZKABAN." He growled.

"It's not him!"

Liar! She is still defending him, lying for him! Snape could take no more. He threw her wand at her, then forced open the door, intending to rush out.

A chilly breeze drifted through the opening and cooled down his fury boiled brain.

"Nymphadora can't use a wand with her broken arms. She will deteriorate if she tries to impersonate Susiel Pond, or lose her current life if she doesn't. She can't make it without your help."

"Why should I help her? She can summon her beloved werewolf for all I care; oh wait, that's the same werewolf tried to murder her! Yet apparently, it didn't stop her from protecting him!"

"You know WHY."

A stinging realization dawned on him: Because I don't want to lose her even if she is mooning over another Marauder. How pathetic!

Snape closed the door quietly and walked back to her bedside. On the white sheet, she looked peaky, battered, and helpless in her true shape. She didn't try to morph away those terrible scars, or failed to do so.

Swallowing his anger reluctantly, he said through clenched teeth, "I'll help you maintain this identity without suicidal transformation, I promise. The magic drains you. No morph until you fully recover. Agreed?"

Measuring him with her weary eyes, she nodded, "Severus..."

Please don't mention the werewolf. I can't handle it right now.

"No more words, especially in this voice. We can talk about it later, and I expect full disclosure." Feeling it might be too harsh, he added, "You should rest now. I have a business to attend to."

He unwarded the room while kept the anti-muggle charm, then turned to the door. Before leaving, he said as gentle as he could manage, "And, I don't think your face is unpleasant, Nymphadora." He almost believed he heard she sobbing and had the decency not to turn around to check.

He paraded his way out of the hospital, making sure as many people saw him leaving as possible: Ms. Pond didn't need a rumored boyfriend, and Dr. Prince can't afford to get involved with a patient.

Considering Susiel Pond was an accomplished actress, it would be a considerable challenge to keep his promise.

Severus Snape always embraced challenges!

One hour later, he Apparated back to her ward with a detailed plan and some necessities.

"Better let your bones healed by muggles. Three valid reasons: fewer suspicions, insurance compensation, and paid sick leave." He said matter-of-factly.

"Not to mention teaching Nymphadora a lesson." She mocked in his voice. After drinking a blood supplement potion, she regained enough energy to change her voice.

"I assure you it NEVER came to my mind. And I'd appreciate it if you take my potion only for convalescing." He managed to keep a straight face and wondered whether the Auror program provided Legilimency lessons.

"Call your assistant and tell her to decline any visit request on your behalf, using any excuse you see fit."

"Sure."

"I prepared some Polyjuice for you, just in case..."

"Polyjuice doesn't work for Metamorphmagus. I'll cast a Confundus." She interrupted him, "Would you please be so kind as to repair my wand arm? For convenience's sake."

The Polyjuice Potion was designed for human use only. His heart skipped a beat, realizing Nymphadora had just told him something important in a subtle way. He decided to ignore it and shelved it with other things that he didn't want to handle right now. We can talk things through later.

"Do you want to inform someone? Andromeda, for instance?"

"No!" She rejected immediately, "I'd put her through a lot. No need to add salt to the wound."

"As you wish."

All was settled, with a little help of magic, like tampering documents and modifying memories. Snape would like not to elaborate on it.


绯之徘徊

Tempora Mutantur, Nos et Mutamur in Illis

用英文写的原因很简单,不想自己的劳动成果突然灰掉。如果喜欢的人多,可能会用中文再写一遍。大纲不会变,情节微调。

Chapter 8  Werewolf Wounds

Before Apparated to Yorkshire, he had informed his secretary to cancel all appointments today and made a mental note to charge Ms. Pond for all his loss later.

He got to the hospital twenty minutes later: had...

用英文写的原因很简单,不想自己的劳动成果突然灰掉。如果喜欢的人多,可能会用中文再写一遍。大纲不会变,情节微调。

Chapter 8  Werewolf Wounds

Before Apparated to Yorkshire, he had informed his secretary to cancel all appointments today and made a mental note to charge Ms. Pond for all his loss later.

He got to the hospital twenty minutes later: had to wait long enough so he could make a passable excuse for the rapid presence.

"Thank god! Mr. Prince! I was so worried! Thank you for coming. I'm Lisa Miles, Ms. Pond's assistant," the girl greeted him. "You got here so fast." Her burden seemed eased the minute Snape entered the room.

"I happened to visit a village in the area." He made it up halfheartedly and hurried to her bedside to check on her. She was surrounded by medical devices, having a blood transfusion and some fluids, just as he required, support therapy only. There were bruises on her face, and her hair was a mess. Apart from that, Ms. Pond's shape was in good condition, for now.

He needed to send the girl away soon, in case Nymphadora lost her morph, better play safe. But he just had to check something up with her.

"What happened?"

"Ms. Pond was shooting a scene before daybreak, you know when the moon is still in the sky, and the sun hasn't risen. Yesterday was a full moon."

I am quite aware of that. Those muggle directors are big fans of the full moon, consider it a sign of beauty, romantic, and all. Those idiots, they just don't know what monsters are out there! He thought wryly to himself, but nodded with a polite smile, encouraging her to continue.

"Everything was going well. Ms. Pond is good at riding horses. She never requires a stunt; I'd say she is better than most of them. Oh, you should see her on the horse, such a wonder! She is a natural, I tell you."

Snape regretted that smile immediately. The woman would never get to the point.

"How did she fall?" He prompted.

"A wolf, sir. We were near a forest. The wolf ran out of it and jumped to the horse. The horse shied and lost control. It ran like crazy with the wolf on the trail. Ms. Pond was so brave. She didn't scream and tried to restrain the horse. But the wolf..."

Snape didn't need to hear more. A werewolf attached Nymphadora. Muggle always mistook a werewolf as a wolf. But why? He had so many questions entangling in his mind.

"Ms. Miles, you may go now, I'll take care from here. It was a long night for you. You are frightened, and you need to rest." Dr. Prince could be very persuasive, not that the girl needed much.

"You are so kind, Dr. Prince. No wonder Ms. Pond speaks highly of you, all those recommendations." Lisa was so glad to leave, "sir, there is one thing..." she trailed off, "no, you must think I am mad."

"Do tell, please."

"There's a moment that I believe that wolf wasn't aiming to get the horse. Its target was Ms. Pond. I know it can't be true, but..."

That was what I thought.She couldn't just Disapparate when the camera was on. It was a wonder that she managed to stay alive without a wand. "You're not mad, just tired and scared. Go back and rest. Everything will be fine."

Lisa thanked him again and left.

"When you get better, which you will, you and I have a lot to catch up, young lady!" Snape scolded her, knowing she couldn't hear.

Before he stepped into the ward, Snape had spoken with her attendings. Nymphadora broke several bones, with internal hemorrhage and unexplainable disseminated intravascular coagulation (DIC). She was in a hysteria state when she was admitted, so the doctor put her under tranquilizer.

Snape drew his wand, "Repello Muggletum", on the second thought, he warded the room, no Apparation or Disapparation allowed. Nymphadora cannot Disapparate away from me again, ever with a wand!

The third spell was for detection. Just like her attending said, a few broken bones, and the uncontrollable bleeding. He would leave the bones to the muggles: no need to raise unnecessary suspicions, and hope the pain would teach Nymphadora a lesson-never leave your wand behind! He tried a few frequent healing spells on her, but she was still bleeding inside, no sign of remission. Now he was a little worried. What if frequent spells didn't apply to a Metamorphmagus? With a pang of fear, he ventured an experimental charm that he once read on an ancient scroll.

The spell backfired and aggravated her condition visibly, and now she was losing her morph: body shrinking, hair turning brown.

She moaned as if she tried to fight the tranquilizer off. The shrink was retarded, and her hair began to turn back golden. Even in this state, her subconscious wanted to keep the current shape. Suddenly, blood oozed from her eyes, nose, and mouth profusely. The unexplainable DIC instantly became explainable. Her body exhausted all her vitality on a trivial function, namely staying in Ms. Pond's shape. Consequently, other vital functions, like coagulation, failed.

Talking about what people would do for vanity! Nothing would work until she returned to her true form before It's too late. He required her cooperation to save her from killing herself. Ironically, she couldn't die as Susiel Pond, even if she traded her life for it.

"Enervate!" with a flick of the wand, he cleaned the residual sedative.

Slowly, she opened her eyes. As she did so, she began to groan with pain.

"Listen carefully, you are bleeding inside, and it won't stop unless you drop the suicidal morph now!" Snape snapped, "Do it or die, your choice. I don't care. I'll see your true form anyway, either you alive or dead."

It was wrong to lash out at a dying patient, yet he felt entitled. She deserved it for what she had done so far!

Silence fell. They just glare at each other, like a competition. Finally, Nymphadora looked away in concession, while Snape maintained his gaze.

Unlike her usual transformation, which finished in a blink, this time, it went in slow motions. It started from her limbs and torso, which became shorter and smaller; then her golden hair turned mousy brown, the color Snape loathed for an obvious reason; at last, her heart-shaped faced began to emerge. She looked the same as he remembered in the Order's time.

But it didn't stop there. Her body was withering to a skeleton covered with pale skin, and her face, oh, he couldn't connect this face to the young Auror. She was beyond recognition with those horrible scars mauled by sharp claws.

Seeing enough Greyback's victims and nearly been one himself, Snape recognized werewolf wounds when he saw them.

He just couldn't believe what he had just witnessed!

A lot of things made sense now: her fake death, her persistent morph, and her full-moon sessions.


绯之徘徊

Tempora Mutantur, Nos et Mutamur in Illis

Chapter7 Emergency contact

Ms. Pond didn't inform him that she would switch to another therapist, so he could count on seeing her at the full moon session.

"In case you haven't noticed, she DID leave the wand behind." In his head, Dr. Prince reminded him.

You can borrow either one you like...

Chapter7 Emergency contact

Ms. Pond didn't inform him that she would switch to another therapist, so he could count on seeing her at the full moon session.

"In case you haven't noticed, she DID leave the wand behind." In his head, Dr. Prince reminded him.

You can borrow either one you like and keep it for as long as your therapy lasts

"She just forgot it. It's a little bit tense back then." Snape refused to think that way. 

"We shall see." Dr. Prince smirked.

 

She didn't show at the next full moon.

"Maybe she is not in town. She is on some TV show, and the schedule is crazy." Yes, that must be the case.

"She hasn't called since your LITTLE tension."

"She's busy! She will visit next month!"

"Sure, keep telling yourself that, and it will eventually come true."

 

Another month passed, still nothing from Ms. Pond.

It didn't matter. She was just a client. Clients came and went, and they had the right to do so. Dr. Prince could totally afford to lose a client.

"Sure, I can lose Ms. Pond. But what about Nymphadora?" Dr. Prince asked.

"WHAT about her? It's not like she didn't do it before. It's her habit, I'd say. Wondering what the werewolf did to deserve THAT."

"You DO understand bringing Lupin up is what got you into trouble in the first place?"

"Maybe that is what shapeshifters do: they just steal another identity and disappear from people when they feel like it!"

"Certainly, she won't change her current identity because of YOU."

"Get lost, you git!"

"You do realize you are talking to yourself now? It's NOT healthy, my professional opinion."

Dr. Prince was right. Only crazy people heard voices in their heads and talked back. It's called schizophrenia.

 

"It's about time you accept that she won't come back. Acceptance is the first and crucial step for recovery." Dr. Prince told Snape. 

Dr. Prince was a good psychiatrist, yet he was wrong about one thing: There was nothing to recover from. She didn't break him.

What's done was done. Life went on. Just another woman walked, Disapparated to be accurate, out of his life. No big deal. Been there, done before. Snape could handle it well, as well as the last time.

"You exceed yourself this time, casting a woman away without actually insulting HER."

He took a Valium, muted his phone, and went to bed. Unlimited prescriptions were one perk of being a psychiatrist. He accepted that she would not visit today, and he had enough from Dr. Prince. A dreamless sleep was all he needed.

He woke up in the morning at 8:00. There were 11 missed calls from an unknown number, between 6:20- 7:40; the last one was twenty minutes ago. Who was so desperate to reach him in the early morning? It couldn't be his patients, as he only gave them his office number. Hesitantly, he called back.

It was from a hospital in Yorkshire.

Ms. Pond fell from her horse when shooting a daybreak scene in the moor and was hospitalized. They tried to contact him since Ms. Pond had named him as her sole emergency contact  and granted him the legal power to act on her behalf before she was on tranquilizers.

"Would you please come and we can talk about her condition? It's complicated."

"I'm on my way," he realized one important thing, and requested, "No invasive test or surgery on her before I get here, please!"

He couldn't image what would happen if a Metamorphmagus were cut open under the impersonation. He doubted anyone knew. Come to think of it, he barely had any knowledge about Metamorphmagus except some random bits Nymphadora mentioned inadvertently in their conversations. In fact, he couldn't recall any books or records in the topic. He always considered her as a normal witch with a rare gift. It never occurred to him maybe Metamorphmagus were different from human beings in broad aspects, until now. Maybe that was where her illusion came from in the first place: the werewolf might be a more appealing companion!

What if she couldn't maintain her morph? She once said her magic would fade if she were in a fatal state. Her current identity was at the stack, along with the life she strived so hard to build.

Visit my deathbed if you are so keen to meet Nymphadora againIt was supposed to be a joke. Now it was happening.

He shouldn't have taken the Valium! He should take Adderall to stay awake and wait for her just like the last two full moons, then he would not have missed the calls and wasted 1.5 hours.

No, he had to think straight. All those "should have," "what if," would do Nymphadora no good. He cast out all the regrets and uncertainties and tried to gather the concentration required to perform a long-distance Apparation without Splinch.

Nymphadora trusted his best judgment. She knew he would do what he must when the time came. That's why she made him the emergency contact, and he had no intention of failing her.




绯之徘徊

Tempora Mutantur, Nos et Mutamur in Illis

本章节深受 Jaxon的"Her Dirty Secret"启发,得到作者授权,已翻译成中文。https://archiveofourown.org/works/23536294 强烈推荐看原文,原作者文笔独具风格。我尽力还原,但是大家都知道,翻译存在损耗,不可避免。

下面是更新的小说正文:

Chapter 6 Metamorphmagus

Since business-hour restriction out of the way, Ms. Pond's therapy became more regular, and Nymphadora started her...

本章节深受 Jaxon的"Her Dirty Secret"启发,得到作者授权,已翻译成中文。https://archiveofourown.org/works/23536294 强烈推荐看原文,原作者文笔独具风格。我尽力还原,但是大家都知道,翻译存在损耗,不可避免。

下面是更新的小说正文:

Chapter 6 Metamorphmagus

Since business-hour restriction out of the way, Ms. Pond's therapy became more regular, and Nymphadora started her midnight visits. Snape was pleased that they no longer had experimental sessions in his office. As much as he enjoyed them, he'd rather resume it for professional use only.

Summer replaced spring, followed by autumn, and eventually became winter. He had sex with various identities, some from his past, and others he didn't even have a clue. He never made any requirement for a specific character. She just picked whomever she saw fit.

She dropped by now and then in different shapes. Her refined skill amused Snape. Ture to her words, her ability matured through time. She never lost her morph even in the most brutal sex and could impersonate it from every aspect imaginable.

When she was Narcissa, she was restrained, stoical, and submissive; she was wild, savage, and dominating, always with a twisted smile on her heart-shaped face, as she wore the shape of Bellatrix. Aunts seemed to be her favorite, another peculiar habit of hers.

They never negotiated the midnight arrangement, yet both parties followed unspoken rules: no cuddle, no small talk, no kissing on the lips, no staying for the night.

He was content with the thing they had, whatever it was. Nymphadora required nothing from him and vice versa. He had no intention of building an orthodox intimacy with anyone.

How could he? Maybe the more accurate question should be with whom? For women in the muggle world, it wouldn't work without tons of lies and explanations, and he had done his fair share during his double agent career, enough for a lifetime! As for women from his past, well, barely anyone available left.

At the very beginning, he had indulged himself with delusions of tasting his acquaintances when she wore their shapes, pretending they were still alive. Given her perfect skill, no challenge at all.

Yet as time went by, he had got rid of those delusions without even noticing when. No matter what her appearance was, he always knew it was Nymphadora, his former student, ex-colleague, and current patient, although he hadn't seen this shape yet.

There were just too many telltales for him to ignore. Her limbs were ice-cold even in the hottest summer; she never made eye contact with him during sex; his name never once came out from her mouth when she came, and others he didn't care to list, like No Intercourse in Her True Form. It's reserved for someone, of course!

Otherwise, things were as close as perfect. Their therapy kept making progress. Although Nymphadora hadn't talked about the reason why she left the wizardry community nor her shooting in the woods, their sessions were no longer filled with uncomfortable silence or sadistic impersonation. She talked about Ms. Pond's life and her early days in the muggle world.

Occasionally, he shared his struggles in fitting into the post-war life, like finishing required courses at a relatively old age, getting his practicing license, and promoting his business.

Ms. Pond was generous enough to invite him to a few exclusive parties and introduce him to her social communities as "the most brilliant therapist". She told vivid stories about how he fixed her up, none of those stories were real, and some even made him blush. Her praise knew no boundary. How she managed to make things up without batting an eyelid was beyond him. Long story short, his client list grew at a rapid speed.

Better yet, she laughed with him when they were left alone, saying those people would buy anything she said. Laughter hardly went hand in hand with her nowadays.

"Thank you for coming, Severus, I had so much fun." She always thanked him as she walked him out of the villa. He was astonished and deeply touched by her consideration. At times like these, Ms. Pond's elegant face blurred in his vision, he saw that mischievous, intelligent witch, and wondered what Nymphadora would look like after so many years.

He felt comfortable with Nymphadora. It required no lie, no hush up, no explanation to maintain. No effort needed from his part to make it work. Just being himself was enough. It was entirely novel for him.

Sure, she was in a struggling phase, but everyone had issues. Dr. Prince was more than happy to walk her through them, for that was what a decent psychiatrist signed up.

He should have been content with what he had and let it be. He shouldn't push his luck. He shouldn't have brought it up.

"You know, if my face is too unpleasant for you, we can always introduce Polyjuice to our intercourse, although the outcome may be debatable. The potion isn't supposed to be used for animal trans-" He never got to finish the sentence, yet the implication was unmistakable.

"Excuse me! I beg your pardon?" She snapped with her back to him, busy with putting her stocking on. She was about to leave.

"You always avoid eye contact during sex!" Snape pointed out accusingly.

"One shall never start looking as one may not like the findings." She said evenly without turning to him.

"What is THAT supposed to mean?"

"One should never ask the question as one may not like the answer." Another dry reply.

"Stop talking nonsense! Just tell me why you never look at me!" He growled

"Tell me, Severus, who will I see if I look into your eyes when you come?" She answered his question with another question. She almost finished dressing.

What is she talking about? Snape had no clue how to answer that question, so he said nothing.

Taking his silence in a wrong way, Nymphadora reacted quickly.

The moment Snape saw her hair turning red, he knew things went terribly wrong.

In the blink of an eye, her morph completed. She turned to face him, looking straight into his eyes, and inquired," is this?"

Snape gasped as he met a pair of green eyes, burning with fury. He was too shocked to say anything. She had never taken this identity until now.

Lily Evans was staring at him, sneered wryly, " That is what I expect! "

Without another word, she Disapparated, leaving her wand behind.


绯之徘徊

Tempora Mutantur, Nos et Mutamur in Illis

Chapter 5 Deterioration

Nymphadora promised she would stick to her therapy as best as she could before left, and she was a woman of her word.
One could hardly keep ...

Chapter 5 Deterioration

Nymphadora promised she would stick to her therapy as best as she could before left, and she was a woman of her word.
One could hardly keep a regular schedule when one was traveling with a film crew, yet Nymphadora managed at least to honor her full moon appointments. She had four sessions after the film began shooting, and three of them were on the full moon.
He was expecting her today, no need to mention the lunar phase, though. He got her phone call right after his office hour began.
"The director changed the plan. It will be a whole day shooting. I can't make it today." She sounded irritated.
"I can wait for you. Rate doubles outside the regular hours, of course." He added the last sentence hastily, didn't want to sound too eager.
"I'm afraid you'll wait in vain. There is a midnight scene in the woods. Wonder when it ends."
"Sounds like an ordeal. You have my sympathy."
"That's the price we pay for fame." She drawled with a lighten voice, "Tschüss!"
With that, she hung up.
The day passed uneventfully. He had six patients that day, including two breakdowns. Not too rough, compared to hers. He finished work at 4:00 in the afternoon and went home. He prepared a simple supper and spent the evening reading in his study.
The book was so fascinating that he could not put it down until 2:20 am. He decided to go to bed, stay up late certainly wouldn't improve his already wrinkled face. After all, he couldn't change his appearance at will.
She showed up three days after the full moon. Apparently, a full moon without therapy took its toll on her. She looked as beautiful and elegant as usual, the perks of being a Metamorphmagus, yet her mood was much darker than the last time she left.
Much as he wanted to make a sneering comment such as "I was under the impression that the lunar phase impacts only werewolves, but clearly, you are an exception," he acted under his better judgment, which was keeping his mouth shut.
She retreated to her original state, lying on the couch in pure silence with her eyes closed.
Snape sat next to her and noticed something different. Her slightly trembling fingers suggested she was scared. That was rare. He had never seen her in this state.
"Ms. Pond, would you like to talk about the things scare you? You're perfectly safe here. No one can harm you." He used his most reassuring voice, which was part of his well-established trademark, hoping she would respond to it. Say something, do something, anything! Even changing to Bellatrix is better than THIS!
Still, nothing, except her fingers were trembling more visibly. Nothing changed at all. Snape began to weigh the consequence of using Legilimency on her. As time went by, the temptation seemed more appealing.
"Ms. Pond, did something happen during your shooting in the woods? Whatever it is, it's over now. You are with me. You are perfectly safe. Nothing can harm you here, I promise." And I mean it. He just repeated those words again and again, not louder than a whisper.
He could not use spells on her, for lawsuits were as bad as AZKABAN, and lawyers were the muggle version of dementors.
As long as she remained in the current shape, namely Susiel Pond, all physical contacts were forbidden, not even holding her trembling hands. The wretched patient-doctor confidentiality guaranteed it. His hands were tied, figuratively, not literally. In fact, he would be much relieved should she had the energy to perform Incarcerous right now.
Words were his only resource in this situation, and he just kept saying them, hoping against hope that she would give any response.
Tick-Tock, Tick-Tock. The session was near its end. He was to fetch his wand as there was no way he would let her go like this. He just had to try one last time, "Nymphadora, no one can harm you on my watch."
Nothing. That was it!
"At least allow me to pour you a glass of whiskey before you leave." He raised to his feet, turned his back to her, and headed to the minibar. He recalled he had some Veritaserum stash, hoping it was in shelf-time. A potion was more subtle, better not to get caught at all. He really hated lawsuits, time-consuming, and all.
"so you can put three drops of Veritaserum in it? I don't think so." Her voice froze him on site.
Recovering from the shock in an instance, Snape matched to his original destination, poured himself a shot, and returned to his armchair.
"Constant vigilance, are we? I gather Mr. Capaldi was right about the paranoia part." He took a sip of the liquid meaningfully. "I must say Moody had a negative influence on you."
Hearing her old mentor's name, she spared a half-smile, "Be that as it may, Severus, I'd kindly turn down any food or drinks you offer. And sorry for letting you see me like this."
"Perish the thought. I am a psychiatrist, and I've seen far worse. You are not even close. Besides, there is nothing ashamed of being scared. Care to share your story?"
"Maybe next time." The timer buzzed at the exact moment.
"May I ask when you are planning to have your next therapeutic session exactly," He tried very hard to hold his professional tone. Be patient. She is YOUR PATIENT! "considering your crazy shooting schedule." Not so much success, apparently.
Nymphadora had once mentioned that her ability had refined through time. She was supposed to have perfect control over every tiny muscle by now, and she clearly tried very hard today, yet failed.
"We shall see." She got up slowly and walked out of the door.
Through the window, he watched her teetering to a limo in her high heels. It dawned on him that her condition might be far worse than it showed. She couldn't summon enough energy to maintain the necessary focus for long-distance Apparate. That might explain why she visited him three days later instead of the next day.
On her limo back to the shooting site, Ms. Pond received a text message from Dr. Prince with a private address attached. "Apparate whenever you need. Home-visit is also optional."
A genuine smile appeared on her now peaky face. "Charge me whatever you see fit." She texted back without a second delay.

绯之徘徊

Tempora Mutantur, Nos et Mutamur in Illis

Chapter 4 Pattern broken

As usual, Nymphadora was on time for her 20th session. Punctuality was one of her virtues.
Snape sat in the armchair near the couch, waiting for her. She went for the drawler directly for the wand. To her surprise, there were two wands, and one was remarkably new.
"I found...

Chapter 4 Pattern broken

As usual, Nymphadora was on time for her 20th session. Punctuality was one of her virtues.
Snape sat in the armchair near the couch, waiting for her. She went for the drawler directly for the wand. To her surprise, there were two wands, and one was remarkably new.
"I found my spare wand the other day. You can borrow either one you like and keep it for as long as your therapy lasts, which I presume you can continue. " Snape explained before she asked and watched her closely for her reaction. Ask me no question, and I tell YOU no lie.
Nymphadora picked up the new wand, studied it for a long, long moment. Finally, she sighed, "I'll take your spare one. It feels more suitable for Apparate." She twirled the wand in her delicate fingers, channeling its innate magic, and synchronized it with her own. Her face looked concentrated. After a strip of black ribbon emanated from the tip, she said, "Thank you, Severus." In a soft voice, barely audible.
Seeing her appreciating his small gesture, Snape felt relieved. He was concerned that she might be too stubborn to take it. He pretended not to hear her words and commented, "I'm impressed by your dexterity. Twirling wand around like that, one may think it won't take a second before you drop it, Nymphadora."
She was apparently in a light mood because she didn't protest his use of her real name. Still playing with the wand, she said in a careless tone, "You have my first therapist to thank. Behavior therapy, a true miracle, totally cured my clumsiness. It's a pity I can no longer work with Ms. Song."
Snape tended to ask why she couldn't see her anymore but thought better against it. Nymphadora had changed her identity to someone before Susiel Pond. Of course, she must change her therapist. Maybe that was also the reason she didn't flee from his office at their unexpected encounter. Should she change her identity again, she wouldn't need to source a new psychiatrist this time. Making the best from the worst, sophisticated and calculating, he would give her credit for that. Muggle therapy really did her good.
"Tell me more about your work with Ms. Song." He lured her into revealing more of her past. His voice had an almost hypnotic effect.
She was lying on the couch now, talking about how Ms. Song trained her out of her clumsiness, toying her new wand with sparks of joy in her amber eyes. Her voice was carefree, remotely resembled that mischief young student in his classroom.
Snape thought to himself in delight: She was talking about herself now, talking about that clumsy witch instead of the elegant actress. Also, there was no sign that she was to follow her full moon routing, transferring to her deranged aunt. It was definitely a significant progress. The wand worth every Galleon he spent.
As much as Snape enjoyed the recreation that she gave him in the full moon sessions, he valued nothing more than his patient's improvement.

绯之徘徊

Tempora Mutantur, Nos et Mutamur in Illis

Chapter 3 Just Business

"I'm afraid I can't continue my therapy unless you provide remote services. I got a role that requires me to travel a lot during shooting." She informed him in her 19th session, "See you in 6 months then, Doctor Prince."


"Dose Apparate accidentally...

Chapter 3 Just Business

"I'm afraid I can't continue my therapy unless you provide remote services. I got a role that requires me to travel a lot during shooting." She informed him in her 19th session, "See you in 6 months then, Doctor Prince."


"Dose Apparate accidentally slip your mind?" Snape scolded her, "Continuity is important for psychotherapy."


"Can't do long distance without a wand. Mine was lost long ago. Haven't you noticed that I always borrowed yours when in need? Lack of observation is a weakness for your occupation." She was not in the play mood today, which meant it wouldn't be a colorful session.


She never ceased to surprise him. He got a new understanding of how desperate she wanted to escape her past. She wouldn't buy herself a new wand!


"Just borrow mine like you always do." He regretted the minute he finished the sentence.


"No, I'll be gone too long. You may need it." She rejected without hesitation.


"When will you set out?" He asked in his most casual tone.


"Right after my next session." She had already closed her eyes, indicating the silence should fall.


Of course, she would make the next one. She had set it on the next full moon. Snape believed that she would never miss her full-moon appointments if it were within her power, and somehow, he had a feeling that she was sad about breaking the routine.


Yes, Nymphadora had built a routine by now. Her appointments were not necessarily on a full moon, and not every session was a colorful one. Yet every full moon had been an experimental session since the seventh.


Bella always visited him on the full moon. That was to say, Nymphadora was still in agony on the full moon. She had not talked about her past, why she left the wizardry society, or how she became Susiel Pond. She just visited him session after session.


Snape doubted she would ever talk about those things, though he had his professional hypothesis. No, he didn't need his expertise to know that Lupin was the root of all her issues. The werewolf had fucked her up hard.


Her 19th session passed in silence. She left his office when the timer buzzed.


Snape decided to purchase a new wand for Nymphadora as she rejected his offer, for valid reasons, of course! He even made a list:


1.It was a brilliant business investment, not a gift of goodwill. With a new wand, Susiel Pond could continue her therapy, which meant Dr. Prince would get paid for his expertise.


2.Nymphadora had made progress, which meant his effort finally paid off. It would be a great shame if her condition stopped improving due to a mere inconvenience, such as the lack of a wand.


3.Fixing a famous actress like Susiel Pond would boost his reputation, attracting celebrities, more business. He could raise his consulting rate. More money for Severus Snape!


Suffice to say that the purchase was purely for business, nothing personal. Bearing this in mind, Snape made a trip to the Ollivanders in Diagon Alley with clean conscious. Unlike Nymphadora, he had no problem visiting the wizardry community when it was necessary. He just didn't associate with them much, not that anyone cared to keep in touch with him, per se.


He knew nothing about Nymphadora's former wand. It was quite personal, and they were not close enough for wand-disclosure. It didn't matter, though. She had borrowed his wand on some occasions and found no challenge wielding it. Truth to be told, she cast delicate spells with it, creating enough restriction yet never once blocking the blood circulation.


Basically, all he needed to do was to find himself another wand. If he felt comfortable with it, so would she.


He was glad that a young salesclerk greeted him instead of the old owner. He always found Mr. Ollivander annoying for the old man had to recite the properties of his wand the moment he entered the shop.


"Good sir, how do you like your wand?" the young man asked him politely.


Great, they also changed their sales model. It would be much easier for him to find Nymphadora a wand.


"A thin wand with perfect flexibility, not too long." No matter what shape she wore now, he remembered her as a petite girl, a Metamorphmagus who could be anyone.


The salesclerk inputted the criteria in his computer and located an inventory number. He pulled out a box from the rear shelf, fetched the wand, and handed it to Snape.

"9 inches, birch, werewolf tendon..."

Snape flinched at the word "werewolf" and highly doubted if Nymphadora would appreciate a wand cored with werewolf tendon. Maybe she would if the tendon were dissected from a certain werewolf, namely Lupin. He allowed himself to enjoy the sarcasm for a moment.


"My apology. I'd like it werewolf free." He came up with a better idea," and suitable for Apparate."


This time, he got a perfect one. Now he just had to wait for the next full moon.

绯之徘徊

Tempora Mutantur, Nos et Mutamur in Illis

Chapter 2: Progress

"You do realize our sessions are going nowhere without you talking or me doing what you forbid, Ms. Pond." He broke the silence with his silky voice.

This was her 7th session. From the day they met in his office, Nymphadora had made it quite clear that the therapy was...

Chapter 2: Progress

"You do realize our sessions are going nowhere without you talking or me doing what you forbid, Ms. Pond." He broke the silence with his silky voice.

This was her 7th session. From the day they met in his office, Nymphadora had made it quite clear that the therapy was merely a part of the impersonation.
Quote "I just made things up with my formal shrink. Consider it as a practice of improvisations, also adding some interesting stuff to the character. Surely, we could skip the dance. " Obviously, the woman had an eccentric concept of interesting stuff.
Most sessions had passed in pure silence since she just laid on the couch with her eyes shut, while he sat in the armchair facing the couch, having no option but to observe her. Sometimes she fell to sleep but her morph never dropped, not a tiny bit.
"I thought you'd appreciate it. Good for your business. You get paid without working. " She replied wryly, in her usual position.
"Bad for my reputation though. Why else do you think Mr. Capaldi referred you to me if you're such a delight? No psychiatrist wants a patient whose condition never improves." He would never lose in a contest of sarcasm.
"Gather he got fed up with all my nonsense. Pity, I told him the truth yet I was diagnosed as delusional disorder and paranoia." She drawled. "Just be glad my condition won't deteriorate, and I'm granting you the permission to brag about having Susiel Pond fixed."
"I won't put my bet on no deterioration, Ms. Pond, and there is such a thing as integrity." As a psychiatrist highly valued professional ethics, Snape set up his mind to give her appropriate treatment. "Care to repeat your nonsense with Mr. Capaldi to me? If it is not too much trouble."
She opened her eyes and inquired with an arch of an eyebrow, "Determined to make progress, are we? Or is it my silence too boring?"
"Care to play?" Slowly, she sat up and said in an unmistakable-seductive way.
"Doctor-patient confidentiality, Ms. Pond. Much as I appreciate your generous offering, I must painfully decline your invitation. With all due respect, I don't fancy the idea of your lawyer having my guts." He remarked politely, looking straight into her eyes.
"I don't recall I am a patient of yours. Wand?" a mock-baby voice smirked as she finished her transformation.
Nymphadora was seriously damaged! Snape had come to that conclusion on their first encounter in his office. The scene of Bellatrix extending a hand for his wand in an alluring manner was just another confirmation.
So much for doctor-patient confidentiality. She wanted to play? Fine, he would play along. Bellatrix Lestrange was definitely not his patient.
He got on to his feet, headed for the desk, and fetched his wand. Without saying a word, he passed her the wand.
"Now we're talking." She took it, closed her eyes, concentrated on channeling with the unfamiliar wand. A few minutes later, she let out a content sigh.
Raised to her feet, she bridged the distance between them. With Bella's iconic madness in her dark eyes, she lifted Snape's chin with the tip of the wander, "Miss me, Potions Boy?" She whispered to his ear.
"Incarcerous." Just a slight flick of the wand, Snape's limbs were tightly bound by black ribbons.
They had it in Bella's sadistic and dominating way, just long enough to fill the session. When the timer buzzed, Susiel Pond dropped his wand and walked out of his office.
He didn't realize it was a full moon until the next day. By checking all her previous appointments, he noticed she always made an appointment on the full moon.
Three months had passed since Nymphadora ran into Severe Snape, and they finally made some progress.


绯之徘徊

Tempora Mutantur, Nos et Mutamur in Illis

Chapter 1 Actress and Psychiatrist

"Well, well, well, how convenient it is for a Legilimens to establish himself as a renowned psychiatrist in muggle society!" she recognized the man waiting for her behind the desk the moment she entered the office. It was Severus Snape. 

She wouldn...

Chapter 1 Actress and Psychiatrist

"Well, well, well, how convenient it is for a Legilimens to establish himself as a renowned psychiatrist in muggle society!" she recognized the man waiting for her behind the desk the moment she entered the office. It was Severus Snape. 

She wouldn'thave dreamed of it. After so many years of avoiding the magical community, sheran into Snape. Yet it made sense for him to live in a non-wizard environmentafter the war. No one would trust a spy, let alone the murderer of AlbusDumbledore.

Nonetheless, she was impressed by his smart occupational choice. An accomplished Legilimens could easily find out the patients' psychological problems without even asking. 

However, her psychiatrist was appalled ather remarks. He stared at her in disbelief, as he was trying to figure out who the hell she was. 

The woman took the seat across him with unbelievable graceful and sniffed, "I reckon that it's beneath you to take a dose of Polyjuice Potion. Constant vigilance, Snape, if you don't want anybody to recognize you."

Snape, who went by the name of Shawn Prince now, checked the appointment once again, on which written in black and white,that the patient should be the famous actress, Susiel Pond, who had been in theindustry for almost 20 years. No one had ever suspected she was a witch. Therewas just no way she could know that he was a wizard capable of brewingPolyjuice. Considering he had no friends, either dead or in prison, she must be an acquaintance. But who could she be? 

Snape studied her more carefully with his best observation. The woman was in her middle thirties, but women's ages were hard to tell nowadays with all those cosmetics, not to mention she was anactress. He had watched her work on TV and the big screen. Some of her roles reminded him of Narcissa Malfoy, the elegant and graceful woman who was kind of a friend. That was the main reason he took the case when her former shrink referred her to him. He wanted to meet her in person. There she was, sitting infront of him, with an ironic expression on her beautiful face. Yet she couldn't be Cissy. Cissy was dead, long gone, with her husband, in that damned war. 

"Identify yourself." He demanded,reaching for his wand in the drawer.

"No wand needed, Snape. Surely something has crossed your mind." The woman said wryly, more a resemblance to Narcissa now, as her golden hair completely turned platinum when the last word dropped.

A name dawned. "Nymphadora! People said you were killed." Snape's voice trailed off. Nymphadora Lupin, the Metamorphmagus married a werewolf. Yet he couldn't relate the tall, graceful woman to that petite, clumsy Auror. He had every reason to be an outcast of the wizardry society. Truth to be told, he enjoyed life much more in the muggle world. With his expertise, he had made a fortune and owned afine social status. But what could be her reason? How could she leave her beloved werewolf behind after she went through so much trouble getting him? Not that he cared. Then, why she went through that much to get him in the firstplace remained a mystery to him.

"I mean no harm. I didn't know that you are my new psychiatrist. A mere coincidence, I may say." She returned to Susiel's world-known appearance in the blink of an eye.

Snape asked, "How did you become Susiel Pond after all? She has been an actress before you finished Hogwarts!" 

"Stealing people's identities, that's what we shapeshifters do for a living, just like you Death Eaters, mining human suffering for gold. " She drawled with heavy sarcasm. 

"Nymphadora, surely you could show your true form in front of me."

"Perish the thought then. It is Susiel Pond to you."  

"It didn't occur to me that you hate your previous life that much." He commented.

"Don't you like living with muggles? Oh, those naive muggles, somehow adorable. They still believe with a wand in hand, and you can easily wave all your sorrows and troubles away while you and I both know better." She drawled in a singsong voice reminding him of Bellatrix Lestrange.

Amusingly, Snape found sarcasm suited her well. She had changed a lot. They all did. There was no trace of that colorful young witch left in the woman. She is more of a Black now, dark, round the twist, and with a hint of insanity in her amber eyes, an updated and combined version of her evil aunts. 

"I gather you need a psychiatrist to address some personal issues, and I happened to be one of the best in the area, Ms. Pond." He said matter-of-factly and emphasized her name.

"With the help of Legilimency, no wonder you are the best. Yet I must sincerely advise you against the idea of performing it on me, or my lawyer will eat you alive."

"I see. You prefer the conventional way. May I kindly suggest that we start our first session now? I'm on the clock." He indicated her to the timer politely, wearing his best customer-serving smile. Threaten by a witch with a lawyer, that was rich. He could really use the humor in it.

"I am fully aware of that. Rest assured that I am more than capable of paying my bill. No matter how expensive you are, Snape." She walked to the couch in the corner and laid down naturally.

"That's Doctor Prince to you. Your history says you suffer from long-term memory loss and obsessive-compulsive disorder. Quite common in actresses, I'd say. I won't be surprised that you will develop depression eventually if you stay in business."

"Believe it or not, performing suits me well. Come to think of it, my entire life is a show, playing different roles, so why not perform for good money and be appreciated?" The irony and bitterness in her voice were too thick to be missed. 

It didn't require a keen mind to figure out that her marriage with that werewolf didn't work well. A happily married woman wouldn't have abandoned everything she had and blended in with muggles. He immediately felt sorry for her, of course, more out of obligations instead of sympathy. Yet deep down, he felt somehow connected to her, as a double agent, he had his fair share of performing.

"Ms. Pond, what do you feel like to talk about today?" He decided to play along, pretending she was just a client and treated her like others since it appeared that she preferred her current life. 

-----------------------------------------------------------------

原创同人小说,SS/NT, post-war,AU。

如果有人喜欢我会持续更新。



兮笑

【授翻/卢唐泰迪】The First Time He Saw It (Shewolf2000)

简介:当他第一次看到它的时候,他四岁。被恶梦惊醒的泰迪·卢平发现他父母的卧室里空无一人。他下楼到了客厅,发现他的妈妈蜷缩在一只巨大的狼身边睡觉。他会有什么反应?

作者:Shewolf2000  

作者的话:AU,除了莱姆斯和唐克斯没有死以外,一切都一样。

原文地址:点这里


译者的话:

(2017.01.25更新)今天终于收到了原作者太太的回复,现在补上授权。感谢太太!超开心!


对这篇实在喜欢得要炸裂,想推荐给更多的人,但是又不擅长写长评,只好走翻译这条路。不过翻译水平有限,更建议大家去读原文(这篇不难读懂的,毕竟是四岁小泰迪的视角嘛)。

原文中的斜...

简介:当他第一次看到它的时候,他四岁。被恶梦惊醒的泰迪·卢平发现他父母的卧室里空无一人。他下楼到了客厅,发现他的妈妈蜷缩在一只巨大的狼身边睡觉。他会有什么反应?

作者:Shewolf2000  

作者的话:AU,除了莱姆斯和唐克斯没有死以外,一切都一样。

原文地址:点这里


译者的话:

(2017.01.25更新)今天终于收到了原作者太太的回复,现在补上授权。感谢太太!超开心!



对这篇实在喜欢得要炸裂,想推荐给更多的人,但是又不擅长写长评,只好走翻译这条路。不过翻译水平有限,更建议大家去读原文(这篇不难读懂的,毕竟是四岁小泰迪的视角嘛)。

原文中的斜体用加粗字体代替。

最后我想说,Teddy is soooooo adorable!

 

 


1.恶梦之后

 

当他第一次看到它的时候,他四岁。

他醒来的时候倒吸了一口气,紧张地打量着周围。他做了个恶梦。一个非常非常糟糕的恶梦。他把他的玩具乌龟小绿紧紧地抱在胸前,努力让自己不再害怕。但是他房间里的每一块阴影都可能藏着一个怪物,随时准备向他扑过来。

这里不安全。他跳出了床,跌跌撞撞地奔向房门,摔倒了之后又呜咽着重新跳起来,胡乱摸到了房门把手,然后飞快地跑过走廊、跑进了他爸爸和妈妈的房间里。他在这里是安全的。爸爸和妈妈会保护他不受阴影里的怪物的伤害。

但是爸爸和妈妈不在这里。

泰迪盯着爸爸妈妈的床。床铺得很整齐、上面一个人都没有。恐惧抓住了这个四岁孩子的心。为什么当泰迪需要他们的时候他们不在床上?

“爸爸?”当泰迪回到走廊上、向着楼梯走去的时候,他小声说——他不想让阴影中的怪物听到,“妈妈?”

他尽可能安静地、蹑手蹑脚地下了楼梯。除了他脚下的楼梯发出的咯吱声和他自己惊慌急促的呼吸声以外,他什么都听不到。到了楼梯的底端,他看到客厅门是开着的,里面闪烁的亮光说明炉火被点着了。

松了一口气的泰迪直接进了客厅,往里面走了几步。

而这就是他第一次看到它的时候。

四岁的孩子猛地停下脚步。他的妈妈蜷缩着身子躺在炉火前的地摊上,身上盖着韦斯莱夫人织的那块厚厚的毯子——这块毯子平时搭在沙发靠背上。她在睡觉,但是她没有枕枕头,而是把她亮粉色的头搁在那只巨大的灰狼的背上。这只狼长着长长的尖牙,它奇异的黄眼睛正在看着炉火。

是泰迪小小的抽气声向狼报告了他的存在。他抬起硕大的头,转了过来,这样他发着光的黄眼睛就直直地盯着泰迪了。

泰迪张开嘴,准备发出一声足以叫醒他妈妈和邻居们的尖叫——很可能连死人都能叫醒。

但是他……没有这样做。他张着嘴盯着狼,狼也在盯着他。它看起来……在害怕?

泰迪说不出是什么让他觉得这只狼看起来在害怕,只能说它就是在害怕。这只狼被吓到了,他很确定这一点。只不过……这完全没有道理。为什么一只巨大得能够两口就把四岁孩子吞下肚的狼会害怕他呢?他这么小。他甚至不像爸爸妈妈那样会魔法。他什么武器都没有,只有小绿。那么为什么这只狼看起来这么害怕?为什么泰迪反而感觉不这么害怕?

泰迪试探性地向狼走了几步。狼做了个被惊吓到的动作,好像要远离这个正在接近的男孩,但是当它的动作打扰到旁边躺着的女人时,他停了下来。因为枕头动了,妈妈在睡梦中发出一点声音,然后稍微移动了一下,把脸更深地埋到狼背上的灰色的毛里面,然后就又不动了。狼看了看妈妈,又移向了泰迪,他的眼睛带着害怕的、现在近乎于恐慌的眼神。它没有再动,只是盯着越来越近的泰迪。

泰迪停在了妈妈和狼的旁边。他的眼睛打量着这只狼,看到了它巨大的体形、它爪子上锋利的指尖、它的尖牙——它们太大了以至于从它紧紧闭着的嘴的两边伸了出来,最后看到了它那双仍然一眨不眨地盯着泰迪的黄眼睛。

它应该挺吓人的。它应该是恐怖的。

但是它不是。

这只狼是个野兽、是个怪物,但是当它和泰迪相互盯着看的时候,它黄眼睛里的某种神情告诉泰迪,它不会伤害他。它身上有什么让他觉得……安全?

这是对的吗?他觉得安全?真的?

但是是的。是的,他真的觉得安全。泰迪对于他站在离怪兽的下巴一英尺远的地方能觉得这么安全感到很惊讶。

他看了看妈妈,忽然想起了他最开始为什么要来找她。他想要叫醒她、告诉她自己做恶梦了。当他爬上父母的床的时候,他通常都会这样做。好吧,不是通常。通常他会叫醒爸爸,因为在半夜被叫醒之后他不像妈妈那样容易发火,而且泰迪必须告诉某个人,因为他需要听某个人告诉他一切都会好的。

他必须要告诉某个人……

“我做了个恶梦。”泰迪对狼说。

狼依然盯着他,然后,它缓缓地点了下头。

泰迪瞪大了眼睛。狼点头了!它看起来几乎就像……就像听懂了他的话一样。

“妈妈和爸爸不在他们的房间里。”泰迪进一步地解释道。狼又点了点头。

“小绿很害怕,”泰迪告诉狼,“他不喜欢恶梦。我不害怕,但是小绿想让我们去找爸爸和妈妈。”狼点了点头。

“那是我妈妈。”泰迪说着用一只小手指了指那个把脸埋在狼毛里的女人,另一只手仍然紧紧地把小绿抱在胸前。“我……我不知道我爸爸在哪儿。”他皱着眉承认道。

狼再次点头的时候,它的眼睛看起来很伤心。狼对于他找不到爸爸这么担心,泰迪感觉有点感动。

“没关系的,”泰迪向狼保证,“他会回来的。有时候他会离开,有时候妈妈会离开,但是他们总是会回来的。如果他们都必须离开的话我会去哈利或者姥姥那里,但是他们总会来接我的。”

狼又点头了。

泰迪挪动着双脚,很不好意思地看着狼。“你……你做过恶梦吗?”他问。狼用力点了点头。“真的?”泰迪惊讶地问。原来连强壮的大狼有时也会做恶梦,知道这一点让他感觉不那么难为情了。

“哦,呃,我是泰迪。”他忽然想起要有礼貌。向刚认识的人介绍你自己是件有礼貌的事情,他认为对刚认识的动物也是一样的。“还有这是小绿,”他把玩具乌龟举出去让狼看,“我爸爸给我的。”狼又点了点头,看起来比之前开心了一点。泰迪笑了。

“爸爸和我在动物园买了他,”他兴奋地说,“爸爸带我去的,我们看了好多动物。”他把他和爸爸去动物园的旅程全都告诉了狼,他喜欢所有的动物,但是他最喜欢乌龟。狼很专心地听着他的故事,在合适的时候总会点头。狼是个很好的倾听者,泰迪喜欢这一点。有些时候成年人不认真听他说话,因为他只是个孩子。不过爸爸总是认真听的,哈利也是。妈妈和姥姥如果不分心的话也是挺不错的听众,但是狼这种完全集中的注意力让他更多地联想到爸爸和哈利。

泰迪对狼解释,他们第一次走进有乌龟的房子的时候他感觉害怕,因为那儿很暗,所以爸爸抱起了他,他觉得安心多了。他喜欢那些在小水箱里面的陆地上走来走去的乌龟,不过他最喜欢的是装着蓝色的水的大水箱里面的那些大乌龟——他们把脚蹼一样的脚从壳里伸出来、游来游去。他和爸爸在他们的水箱前面站了很久,看着乌龟们来回地游动。爸爸把他从水箱的一边抱到另一边,这样他们就可以跟着乌龟移动。

“然后我们去了商店,爸爸让我挑一只乌龟,我选了小绿。”泰迪愉快地结束了他的故事。“我给他起名叫小绿,因为他是绿色的。”泰迪解释道。

狼点头表示对他的起名的强烈同意。泰迪笑了,他真喜欢这只狼呀。

“你想当我的朋友吗?”泰迪问。狼给了他到目前为止最热情的点头,泰迪的笑容更大了。他喜欢结交新朋友。

他向狼伸出了一只手,它看起来一时又有点害怕。泰迪把手放在狼的头顶,轻拍了几下。狼的眼睛瞪得非常圆,看起来……很吃惊,泰迪断定。

“我很高兴我们现在是朋友了,”泰迪一边拍着狼一边告诉它,“我觉得我就叫你……小狼狼(Wolfie)。”

嗯,泰迪想,这对他的新朋友来说是个好名字。他真擅长起名字(例如,管绿色乌龟叫小绿)。

“可以吗?”他把手拿开、仔细看着狼。狼点了点头。

“很好,”泰迪说着坐在地毯上,继续和狼聊天,“你是我的新朋友小狼狼。你不能作我最好的朋友,因为爸爸是我最好的朋友。”他解释道。

“妈妈也是我的朋友,但是妈妈不得不经常去上班。爸爸和我待在家里,而且我们一起做好多事情。有时候他带我去动物园、公园或者霍格莫德之类的地方。我喜欢去霍格莫德,因为我们会去糖果店、尝所有的巧克力,但是不要告诉妈妈!爸爸总是让我保证不会告诉妈妈他让我吃了多少巧克力。

“爸爸也教我东西,比如数字和字木表。”泰迪继续说。他把字母表背诵了一遍给小狼狼听,它看起来很佩服的样子。

“想看点酷的东西吗?”泰迪问。狼点了点头。泰迪把他的脸挤在一起,本来他的头发应该是自然的浅棕色(恶梦之后一般都是这样),现在变成了亮紫色。

“这不酷吗?”泰迪问。狼点了点头。从它的眼睛来看它可能在笑,即使他紧紧地闭着嘴。

“妈妈也能这么做,”泰迪说,“有时候我们一起变形,她让我看怎么变搞笑的鼻子之类的!”

泰迪告诉小狼狼所有关于他的变形、他的父母和朋友的事情,在泰迪不停地说啊说的时候,小狼狼看起来越来越放松。但是某种小心翼翼的神情依然没有离开狼的眼睛。

他告诉小狼狼,他和妈妈去买衣服,他们为自己挑出了几十双颜色鲜艳的有图案的袜子。他讲了和哈利一起看魁地奇的故事,还讲了和姥姥一起做圣诞曲奇的事情。但是他讲的主要是他和爸爸的故事,因为那样的故事最多。

“我爸爸是世界上最好的爸爸。”泰迪对狼说。他并不知道这话对它里面的那个人来说意义多么重大。

泰迪很享受和他的新朋友小狼狼聊天,但是最后他开始觉得困了。他可能应该上床,但是他不想。万一他和小绿独自回到房间的时候怪物从阴影里出来了呢?

他大大地打了个哈欠,小狼狼看起来很关心。“我能留在这儿和你和妈妈一起睡吗?”泰迪问。狼考虑了很长时间才慢慢点了头。“谢谢!”泰迪说。他快步走近小狼狼和妈妈,拎起妈妈盖着的毯子的一边,钻了进去。他和小绿躺在妈妈旁边,他的头放在狼背上浓密的毛上。

“晚安小狼狼。”泰迪带着睡意咕哝着,闭上了眼睛。他很快就睡着了,没有注意到狼转过头来看着他,没有看到当他蹭着这野兽的毛发的时候它脸上的表情,也不知道在他安睡在狼的身侧的时候,狼一直在注视着他。

 

2.第二天早上

 

“泰迪?”

泰迪眨了眨眼,有一瞬间对于他在哪儿感到有点困惑。

“泰迪?”他妈妈又叫了一次。她坐起来审视着她睡着的儿子,韦斯莱夫人的毯子从她肩膀上滑了下来。

“早上好,妈妈。”泰迪说着把他的头微微转过来,这样它就不是完全埋在灰色的毛里面的了。炉火已经熄灭了,窗外的光把客厅稍微照亮了些。天色还很早。

“泰迪,你在这儿干什么呢?”妈妈问。她听起来很惊讶。

泰迪也坐了起来,把小绿放在大腿上,仔细地瞧着妈妈震惊的表情。“我做恶梦了,”泰迪解释道,“你不在楼上。”

妈妈用手理了理她的乱糟糟的粉色头发:“所以你就决定下到这里和我们睡在一起?”

“我问过了!”泰迪生气地宣布道。毕竟他经过小狼狼的允许了。哦,小狼狼!

“妈妈,”他兴奋地说,“这是我的新朋友,小狼狼!”

妈妈的眉毛扬得那么高,泰迪几乎以为她是在把自己的额头变小。“……你的朋友……小狼狼?”她慢慢地问。

泰迪微笑着点头。

“你醒了吗?”她拍打了几下狼的后背,对它说。它扭过头看着她。“哦,你当然是醒着的,你就没睡,对吧?”

“所以你和小狼狼是朋友,是吧?”她问泰迪。

“对,”泰迪高兴地说,“我来找你和爸爸的时候遇到了他。小狼狼真友好,而且他有时候也做恶梦。我问小狼狼他愿不愿意做我的朋友,所以小狼狼和我现在是朋友啦。”

“你现在不,我是说你那时候不……你那时候不害怕吗,当你见到小狼狼的时候?”妈妈皱着她高高扬起的眉问。

“不。”泰迪说了个谎。

一条眉毛又扬了起来。

“好吧,小绿刚开始有点害怕,”泰迪承认道,“但是小狼狼真的挺好的,妈妈!小狼狼绝对不会伤害我的,所以没理由害怕。小狼狼是我的朋友。”

妈妈花了一分钟来思考他的话。然后……她忽然大笑起来。

“哦,我要弄个横幅!”她在大笑中宣布道,“横幅上会写着‘我早就告诉过你’,然后我要把它们挂满整个房子,而你——”她用力拍了拍小狼狼的后背,“不能有任何意见!”(don't get to say a thing about it)

妈妈一直在笑,泰迪觉得很困惑。他转向小狼狼,对方带着一种不怎么觉得有趣的表情看着妈妈。

“什么事这么好笑,妈妈?”最后泰迪开口问道。

妈妈叹了口气,终于冷静了一点:“所有的事,泰迪,所有的事。”她看了看小狼狼,又看着泰迪,然后更加严肃地说:“我很高兴你不感到害怕,泰迪。”

“不,小狼狼是我的朋友,”泰迪重复道,“我把我和小绿、你和爸爸、还有哈利和姥姥的事情都告诉小狼狼了。”

“是吗?”妈妈问。

“嗯,”泰迪回答,“小狼狼是个好听众。”

“是的,”妈妈小声说,沉思地看了小狼狼一会儿,“但是实际上,”她说着又看向泰迪,“在这里的小狼狼早就知道关于你的一切了。”

狼忽然动了起来。它站起来,转过整个身体面对着妈妈,它的黄眼睛比之前还要圆。

“对,我要告诉他。”妈妈回答道,好像狼问了她一个问题一样。她带着决心迎上它的凝视。“他很显然不害怕你。你是他的朋友小狼狼,看着梅林的份儿上!”

妈妈和小狼狼继续瞪着对方,直到一分钟后狼终于屈服了、闷闷不乐地点了点头。

“小狼狼怎么会知道关于我的一切呢?”泰迪有点困惑地问。

妈妈转过去看着他,眼睛里依然带着充满决心的光:“因为,泰迪,这只狼是你爸爸。”

泰迪瞪着妈妈,然后扭过头看着狼。狼垂着头,忧伤地凝视着泰迪。

然后他又看着妈妈。然后又看向狼。然后又是妈妈。

“这只狼……是爸爸?”他重复道,不太确定自己是不是准备好要相信了。

妈妈点了点头:“是的泰迪。你看,你爸爸是个狼人,这就意味着大部分时间他看起来像——呃——爸爸。但是每月一次,他会变成一只狼。”她指了指旁边的狼。

泰迪又在她和狼之间来回看了看。“你确定吗?”他问,不太能摆脱那种她马上就要宣布这是个玩笑的感觉。这只狼怎么能是爸爸呢?

“我相当确定,亲爱的。”妈妈回答。

泰迪又仔细地打量着狼。它看起来真的完全不像爸爸。除了它那忧伤的眼睛。爸爸有时候有这样的眼睛,大多是在他以为泰迪没在看他的时候。

“爸爸?”他问狼。

非常忧伤的黄眼睛注视着他的眼睛,过了一会儿狼慢慢地点了点头。泰迪的嘴张大了。他瞪大眼睛。

“泰迪,”妈妈看起来有点担心地问,“你还好吧,宝贝?”

“爸爸是只狼。”泰迪继续瞪着眼睛,轻声说。

“是的,对,宝贝,”妈妈慢慢地说,“但是记住,泰迪,它并不可怕,是吧?你告诉我你不害怕,记得吗?你知道爸爸永远不会伤害你,对吧?”

泰迪没在听。“真的是真的吗?”他继续盯着这只忧伤的、现在带着有点受伤的表情的狼,“真的是你吗,爸爸?”

狼又点了点头。

“泰迪……”妈妈又开口了。

“那真是太酷了!”泰迪大喊道。妈妈和狼都跳了起来。妈妈担心的表情一下子就消失了,因为她试图忍住第二轮的大笑。但是泰迪没有看她。他在看这只狼……小狼狼……他的爸爸……他的狼爸爸,对方的痛苦和忧伤的神情被一种睁大了眼睛的惊讶取代了。

泰迪站起来,双手叉腰,就像妈妈想要严肃地说些什么的时候一样。“哦,难怪我们这么合得来。”他宣布。

妈妈还是败给了她的笑意。她咯咯笑着,从她坐的地方向后滚,当她的头撞到沙发的前端时也毫不在意。她捂着肚子笑啊笑啊。“哦,好多横幅!”她高声叫道。

泰迪和他的狼爸爸对视了一眼。“妈妈好奇怪。”泰迪说。狼爸爸用力点了点头,用他大大的黄眼睛翻了个白眼。泰迪咯咯地笑了。

“嘿!我听到了!”妈妈说。她坐起来,假装在冲他们皱眉。

“哦,那是事实!”泰迪仍在笑着。狼爸爸又点了点头。

“哦我明白现在是怎么回事了,”妈妈说着双手叉腰,“你们这些男孩子又在密谋反对我了,是不是?哦,我可不能忍受这个!我要来抓你了!”

她扑向泰迪,泰迪尖叫着躲避她、靠近了狼爸爸。他用胳膊环住狼爸爸的脖子,把自己的脸埋在狼毛里。

妈妈看着他们两个站得这么近,有什么在她眼睛里一闪而过。她和狼爸爸对视了一下,表情显得更加严肃了。

“好吧,泰迪,”她依然笑着,但是再也没有开玩笑的意味,“我们需要建立一些基本规则。过来。”

泰迪从狼爸爸身边离开,走过去坐在他妈妈腿上。“好,嗯,我很高兴你不害怕你爸爸,但是当他是只狼的时候你在他身边要特别小心,明白吗?”泰迪点了点头。“好,”她继续道,“无论你做什么,不要试图摸他或者接近他的嘴,你明白吗?他的牙齿很锋利又很危险。你可以这样拍他的头顶,”她说着演示了泰迪昨晚已经做过的动作,“你也可以抚摸他的背,”她轻轻拍着她的狼丈夫的背,“但是永远不要把你的手,或者你身体的任何部分,靠近他的嘴。你明白吗?”泰迪又点了点头。他注意到了妈妈语气里的严肃和狼爸爸眼睛里沉重的神情。

妈妈抱起了泰迪,让他面对着自己。“我需要你向我保证,泰迪,”她直视着泰迪的眼睛,“我需要你向我保证当爸爸是只狼的时候你不会碰他的嘴,否则你就不能和他玩了。”

“我保证。”泰迪说,他是认真的。他能够分辨出这不是个玩笑,或者一个可以挑战的规则。

妈妈笑了。“好啦,”她说着把泰迪放回她的腿上,“不要碰嘴,一切都没问题了。哦,但是你可能也应该躲开他爪子上尖尖的部分,”她补充道,“它们不像嘴那么危险,但是如果你划伤了,伤口要很长时间才能愈合,即使有魔法也一样。所以小心点,好吗?”

“好。”泰迪同意了。

“太棒了!”妈妈愉快地说。狼爸爸看起来又开心了一些。

“爸爸什么时候就不再是狼了呢?”泰迪问。

“嗯——”妈妈看着表说,“实际上是半个小时之后。我该开始做早饭了。”她把泰迪放下,站了起来。“那么,当我准备早饭的时候,”她调皮地笑着,“爸爸让你骑一会儿怎么样,嗯?”

“好耶!”泰迪大喊。狼爸爸退后了一步,用那种他告诉她她疯了的时候常有的眼神凝视着妈妈。妈妈无视了他,把泰迪抱起来、放在狼爸爸的背上。

“抱紧了!”她说。

泰迪马上抓住了两把厚厚的灰毛。“准备好了!”他宣布。

什么都没发生。

“好了,走吧!”妈妈对狼爸爸说。坐在狼爸爸背上的泰迪看不到狼爸爸看着妈妈的表情,但是这个表情似乎把妈妈逗乐了。最后,狼爸爸开始了一段不情不愿的小跑。

泰迪愉快地叫着,更用力地抓着狼毛,狼爸爸带着他绕着客厅转圈,妈妈笑着走向厨房。

“大横幅,莱姆斯。”她离开的时候说。

骑狼爸爸超级好玩。等他们绕着客厅转了几圈之后,泰迪待得更舒服了,他叫着“再快点,爸爸,再快点!”。狼爸爸加速了一点。妈妈又出现在门口。“喂,不要太快,“她对泰迪说,“不要把你可怜的老爸累坏。”狼爸爸吐出一口气,这让妈妈回到厨房的时候又开始笑了。

狼爸爸带着泰迪走遍了整个房子,当他上楼梯的时候非常小心以保证泰迪不会滑下去。他们参观了他和妈妈的房间,然后是泰迪的房间,然后他们只是把头探进厕所里,因为这里对于大灰狼来说太小了。“我们去看看妈妈吧!”泰迪说。狼爸爸顺从地带着泰迪下了楼、走进厨房里。

“你们好!”妈妈站在炉子边做香肠。她看了看她的表,然后看着狼爸爸。“时间差不多了,是吧?”

狼爸爸点了点头。妈妈把香肠放在盘子里,带着他们回到客厅里。

“做什么的时间?”当他和狼爸爸跟着她回到炉火前面的毯子上时,泰迪问道。

“爸爸变回爸爸的时间。”妈妈说着,把泰迪从狼爸爸身上一把抱下来。

“哦,好吧。”泰迪说,不太确定他对此是高兴还是难过。

“我们要给你爸爸留一些隐私,嗯?”当爸爸躺回地毯上的时候妈妈说。

“我想看。”泰迪对她说,但是她摇了摇头。

“不,这是你爸爸的事情。”她简单地说。她用髋部支撑着泰迪,空出一只手来抓起了韦斯莱夫人的毯子。她把毯子盖在狼爸爸身上,从口鼻一直到尾巴。然后她拔出魔杖,低声念了几个咒语。当时的泰迪并不知道那是什么,但是等他长大后他会意识到,那是非常强力的无声咒。“好啦。”她说着抱着泰迪回到了厨房。

泰迪的计划是等他妈妈把他放下来,在妈妈来得及阻止他之前跑回客厅里。不幸的是,妈妈似乎已经预见到了这种计划,所以一直都没有把他放下来。她在门上额外加了一个无声咒,然后开始用一只手打蛋和炒蛋,依然抱着泰迪。

“妈妈?”泰迪问。

“什么事,泰迪?”妈妈说。她的手肘碰到锅把手,差点把装着鸡蛋的平底锅从火炉上碰下来,但是又快速地把它救起来了。

“爸爸怎么变回来呢?”泰迪问。“是不是像你和我变形那样?是不是就挤一挤他的眼睛、然后‘噗’的一下,他就又是爸爸了?”

当妈妈搅拌鸡蛋的时候,一抹忧郁的神色划过她的脸。“不,甜心,”她安静地说,“对他来说更复杂一点点。”

泰迪安静地注视了她一分钟,感觉到他不应该再问那样的问题了。“他什么时候会再变成一只狼?”他最后问。

“下次满月的时候。”妈妈回答。她尽可能完美地用一只手把鸡蛋弄出平底锅、放到盘子里。只有三分之一落到了地上。

“那是什么时候?”泰迪问。

妈妈皱着眉、用魔杖让地上的鸡蛋消失:“到时候爸爸和我会让你知道的,好吗宝贝儿?”

“好吧。”泰迪说。

妈妈把装着鸡蛋和香肠的盘子放在桌子上,然后走到橱柜那里拿出几个瓶子,瓶子里面装着颜色鲜艳的魔药。她又看了看表。

“我们为什么不去看看你爸爸怎么样了呢?”妈妈问。

“好啊!”泰迪说。

妈妈抱着他回到了客厅,另一只手里拿着两瓶魔药。毯子下面的那一块儿比之前小多了。它现在看起来像是爸爸的大小了。它没有动。妈妈把泰迪放在旁边,走过去跪下,把魔药放在旁边的地上。她掀开了一部分毯子,露出了爸爸的头。

“看,”她微笑着说,“是爸爸。一切都恢复正常了。”

泰迪没有笑。他爸爸不再是狼了,但是他看起来肯定不正常。他侧身躺着、面对泰迪,泰迪可以看到他脸色苍白、还有黑眼圈。他看上去病得很严重。而且他还没有意识。

“他病了吗?”泰迪很小声地问。他在他放下小绿的地方找到了他,把他抱在胸前。

“不算是。”妈妈说。她站起来从沙发上抓了一个大枕头,然后跪回来、把它塞到爸爸的头下面。“只是累了。变成狼再变回来对他来说是非常累的。”

“他看起来不像是累,”泰迪紧紧抓着小绿反驳道,“他看起来病得很重。他为什么不醒来呢?”

“哦他会的。”妈妈说。她开始用手轻拍爸爸的脸。“莱姆斯?快点,醒来吧,莱姆斯。起来。”她更用力地拍着他,给他翻了个身,这样他就更加仰面躺着,他的脸对着她的。“快点,莱姆斯,你得把你的魔药喝了。起来!”

爸爸的眼睛睁开了。“朵拉?”他咕哝着,他嘶哑的声音不比耳语大多少。

“你好亲爱的,”妈妈微笑着说,“我给你拿了点魔药。”

爸爸呻吟着皱起眉,妈妈把他的头和肩膀拉到自己大腿上,让他坐直到足够喝药而不被呛到的地步。“给你。”她说着把一个瓶子放在他嘴边并且让它倾斜着。他因为魔药的味道而皱起了脸,或者是因为疼痛而皱眉,但是他喝下了整瓶魔药。“还有一个。”她说着,用第二瓶魔药重复了之前的过程。

泰迪怀疑这只是他的妄想,但是他觉得他爸爸喝完魔药之后看起来可能稍微不那么苍白了。

“谢谢。”当被妈妈放回枕头上的时候,爸爸含糊不清地对妈妈说。

“没事,亲爱的——等等,不,先别睡,”她说,当他的眼睛合上的时候又一次轻拍着他的脸,“莱姆斯,加油,保持清醒。有人想来说一声早上好。”她抬起头,对她的儿子笑着,“过来躺在你爸爸旁边,泰迪。”

泰迪快速地靠过来,把头枕在爸爸的枕头上,面对着他。在近处爸爸看起来甚至更糟糕了,但是至少他的眼睛是睁开的,而且当它们聚焦在男孩的脸上时,他勉强露出了一个微笑。

“泰迪。”他开心地低语。

“你生病了吗,爸爸?”泰迪问。

“没有,只是累了。”他向他儿子保证,“你不害怕我。”

他试图把这句话像一个陈述句一样敷衍过去,但是泰迪能听出来里面的疑问。

他摇了摇头:“嗯,爸爸,我不害怕。你是我爸爸。我永远不会害怕你。”

爸爸的笑容更大了,但是他的眼皮支撑不住了:“我真高兴,泰迪。我爱你。”

“我也爱你,爸爸。”

爸爸愉快地呼了口气,同时又闭上了眼睛。

“我们让你爸爸休息会儿。”妈妈说。她把空瓶子收拾起来,然后站了起来。“咱们吃早饭吧。”她的声音听起来比泰迪认为这种情况下应该有的声音更加欢快一点。

泰迪跟着妈妈回到厨房。她弄好了两盘食物,她和泰迪各一盘,但是泰迪觉得不是很饿。

“他变回来的时候总是这么累吗?”当妈妈踉跄地去拿杯子和果汁的时候泰迪问。她保持安静的时间长到泰迪以为她不准备回答了,这时候她说:“是的,泰迪,但是他总会好起来的。让他休息一会儿,他到晚饭时就能下床走动了。现在把饭吃完吧。”

泰迪和妈妈一起吃早饭。当妈妈到楼上为工作而打扮时,泰迪回到了客厅,躺在爸爸旁边,看着他睡觉。泰迪不担心。如果妈妈说他会好起来的,那么他就会好起来。但是小绿有一点点担心。

妈妈重新出现的时候看起来完全不像个一整晚都待在地板上的人。她那有刺头的粉色头发很完美,她化的妆也是,当她大步走过地毯的时候她的傲罗长袍在她身后鼓起来。

“好了瞌睡虫,”她弯下腰摇着爸爸的肩膀,“我要去上班了,所以你得到床上去。”

爸爸咕哝了一些泰迪听不懂的话。他确定妈妈也没有听懂,但是她猜了一下。

“是啊我知道我一般会在第二天早上放假。”她说着把毯子全都掀开了。他抖了一下,抓着他的睡衣。“但是今天有个大案子我不得不去,记得吗?如果我不把你弄到床上去,你就要在这儿待一整天了。你想那样吗?”

更多没法理解的咕哝。

“我觉得你不想。”她说着抓住他的胳膊、把他拉起来。

爸爸一半是自己起来、一半是让自己被拉着站起来,同时他叹了世界上最大的一口气。

“行了。”妈妈轻快地说。她试图把他的胳膊搭在她肩膀上,但是他咕哝着“我能搞定”,所以她松开了,让他抓着她的胳膊,慢慢地走向客厅门。

“你想吃早饭吗?”妈妈问他。

泰迪看着他爸爸,他脸色变得有点绿、摇了摇头。“吃不下。”他说。

“那好吧,我会把剩饭放起来,你想吃的时候再吃。”

泰迪跟着他的父母走出了客厅。爸爸用紧紧抓住楼梯的栏杆,指关节都变白了,他和妈妈慢慢地爬上楼梯。泰迪感觉“你还好吗,爸爸?”这个问题就在他的唇边,但是决定不去问。爸爸很显然不好,但是妈妈保证他会好起来的。

在卧室里,妈妈刚把床罩扔回去,爸爸就瘫倒在床上了。泰迪和小绿站在走廊上看着妈妈给爸爸掖好被子、在他的额头上轻轻吻了一下。“做个好梦,莱姆斯。”她说。爸爸低声说了些感谢的话,然后更深地蜷缩进毯子里、睡着了。

妈妈回过头,带着忧伤的微笑看着泰迪,然后走向他,领着他回到走廊,然后关上了她身后的卧室门。

“我必须去上班了,好吗泰迪?”她悄声说,“你爸爸现在需要休息,但是如果你需要什么你可以叫醒他。但是只有在你真的需要什么的时候,好吗宝贝儿?除此以外你都需要让他睡觉。”

泰迪点了点头。

“我会给你留些午饭在厨房桌子上,你饿的时候就吃。现在,在你爸爸睡觉的时候,你为什么不找点安静的事情做呢?为什么不去给爸爸画点画呢,这样他醒来的时候你就可以给他看了。”

泰迪的眼睛亮了。他妈妈就知道会这样。

“我会给他画画!”泰迪兴奋但是安静地说。

“这才是我的好孩子。”妈妈说。她在他的额头亲了一下。“晚上见,宝贝儿。为了你爸爸,乖一点,好吧?”

“拜拜,妈妈。”他说。她下楼去了,泰迪冲回他的房间去拿他的工具。

泰迪是个特别棒的画家。妈妈和爸爸总是这么告诉他。卢平家的墙上和橱柜上都挂满了泰迪的精美画作,哈利家的很大一部分也是这样,还有姥姥家。哈利总是兴高采烈地笑着,把泰迪最新的画作钉在一面墙上,那里过去有家养小精灵的断头或是纯血统的偏执狂,不过哈利没告诉过他。姥姥把他的画挂在她妈妈像他这么大的时候画的画旁边。

他有一大盒蜡笔,超过一百种不同的颜色。他还有一些特别好的彩铅,那是赫敏阿姨在他四岁生日的时候送给他的。泰迪——和在场的其他人一样——在打开礼物的时候很惊讶。他们都以为那会是一本书。

他认识的所有人都说他的画真的很棒,他每次听到都洋溢着骄傲之情。但是最让他高兴的表扬是他偷听到爸爸对妈妈说的话。当时爸爸不知道泰迪在听。

“我得说,比一般的四岁孩子好多了。我认为他再大一点就能培养出相当的才能。”

从他听到那句话以后,泰迪对于他的美术就更加用功了,决心不辜负他爸爸的期望。爸爸相信他,世界上没有比这更美妙的感觉了。

当爸爸在隔壁房间睡觉的时候,泰迪整个上午和大部分的下午都给爸爸画新的画,中间只稍微停了一下去吃妈妈在厨房给他留的三明治。等泰迪终于听到他父母的卧室里有动静的时候已经是傍晚了。他收拾起他崭新的大作,去看他的爸爸。

爸爸看起来还是不太好,但是确实比早上好多了。他坐在床边,脚垂在地上,用一只手揉着太阳穴。

“加油,莱姆斯,起来。”他对自己嘀咕着。

“嗨。”泰迪说。

爸爸的头猛地抬起来,但是当他看到泰迪的时候他微笑了。

“你好,泰迪。”他热情地说。

“你觉得好点了吗?”泰迪不安地问。

“好多了。”爸爸说,“你拿着什么呢?”

“我给你画了画!”泰迪兴奋地说。

“给我?”爸爸问。

泰迪急切地点了点头。

“好吧,”爸爸说着把腿移回床上,拍了拍他旁边的床垫,“为什么不过这儿来给我看看呢?我是说……如果你愿意的话。”他很快地补充道。

泰迪没有注意到他爸爸的尴尬,他拿着画跳到床上,爬到爸爸身边。

“我真的特别努力地画它们了。”泰迪说。

“啊,我很激动地想看呢。”爸爸说。

泰迪把一堆画放在爸爸的大腿上。

他期待着像往常一样立刻就有的表扬,但是当爸爸拿起第一幅画的时候,他的脸上只有惊愕。

可能他只是没理解这幅画。

“那是我,”泰迪指着画上那个有天蓝色头发的男孩,“那是你。”他指着那只有着黄眼睛的大灰狼。爸爸什么都没说。“哦,还有那是小绿。”泰迪指着天蓝色头发男孩手里的乌龟。

爸爸继续瞪着这幅画,一句话都没说。

“你不喜欢吗?”泰迪问。

爸爸似乎从某种沉思里摆脱出来了:“我……我喜欢,泰迪。这……这挺不错的。我猜我只是……很惊讶。我对于你用这种方式画我感到惊讶。”

“哦,”泰迪说,他还是没有完全理解问题在哪儿,“哦,好吧,它们都是这样画的。”他把第一张从爸爸手里拿出来,露出了下面的画。上面画着一个黄头发的男孩、一个粉头发的女人和一只大灰狼。

“这张有妈妈。”他说。

“是啊,我看到了。”爸爸安静地说。

泰迪拿走了第二张画。“这张只有你和我,”他指着第三张画说,画上是一个红头发的男孩骑在大灰狼的背上,“这是你背着我走的时候。”他指着画上暗示着这幅画的场景是在他的卧室的其他元素,“这特别好玩,爸爸。我觉得你可能想要一张这样的画。”

他移开第三张画,露出第四张。“那是昨天晚上。”他说。这幅画上,一个粉色头发的女人躺在一只大灰狼的旁边,他们躺在炉火前面,一个棕色头发的男孩和一只绿色的乌龟在房间另一边看着他们。

“我第一次看到你的时候就是这样的。”泰迪解释道,“你……你看起来很害怕,爸爸。你为什么要害怕呢?”

爸爸用手臂环住泰迪的肩膀,把他拉近,轻柔地蹭着他紫色的头发,然后终于坦白道:“我害怕你会觉得害怕,泰迪。我觉得如果你看到我那个样子,看到我是个怪物,你就会害怕我,即使我变回来你也不会想让我靠近你。那样我受不了,泰迪。我太爱你了,我不能忍受你可能会害怕我。”

“但是我不害怕。”泰迪说。

“我知道,”爸爸说,“我现在知道了。这太让我开心了,泰迪,你不知道。”

父子俩在那里静静地坐了一会儿。泰迪让爸爸紧紧抱着他,因为他的一部分明白那是他爸爸非常需要的,比睡眠和魔药都更需要,为了让爸爸感觉好一些。

“爸爸。”过了一会儿,泰迪安静地说。

“嗯,泰迪。”爸爸回答。

“我需要一支新的灰色蜡笔。我的都用完了。”

最后,爸爸终于大笑起来。

 

 

3.就像爸爸一样

 

月圆过去的几天后,泰迪充满期待地蹦蹦跳跳,专注地注视着客厅的炉火。

“哈利!”

泰迪的教父在泰迪撞上他、抱住他的腿之前几乎没有时间直起身把肩膀上的灰掸下去。

“哦,你也好啊,泰迪。”哈利笑着,把泰迪从他腿上掰下来、抱在怀里。

“嗨哈利!”泰迪激动地尖叫。

哈利又轻笑了一声。“你觉得我们再也见不到彼此了,”他说,“但是我上周末才来过这儿啊,记得吗?”

“我想你。”泰迪告诉他。

“哦,你知道吗,小子?我也想你。”

哈利把泰迪放下,坐在沙发上。泰迪跳上去坐在他旁边。

“那么,”哈利说,“告诉我你这儿最近发生了什么事吧,泰迪。”

“我爸爸是个狼人。”泰迪大声宣布。

哈利眨了几次眼睛。“是……他是,”最后他说,“呃,你知道多久了?”

“我看见他了,当他是只狼的时候。”泰迪说。

哈利的眉毛扬了起来:“你看到他是狼的样子了?”

“嗯。”泰迪愉快地说。他简要地复述了这个故事:从恶梦中醒来,冒险下楼去,发现妈妈和大灰狼,还有他怎样和狼成为了朋友。

“然后妈妈告诉我小狼狼其实是爸爸!”泰迪兴奋地结束了这个故事。

哈利在耐心地听泰迪的故事时一直保持安静,最后才说:“那么你,你完全不害怕吗?既然你知道你爸爸会变成狼?”

“不!”泰迪欢快地说,“爸爸以为我会害怕,但是我不。这就是为什么妈妈贴着那个横幅。”

“是啊,关于那个,我一直纳闷儿呢。”哈利看了一眼挂在壁炉上方的墙上的巨大的黑色横幅。这个横幅太大了以至于它两边都多出了几英尺。上面用令人眼睛疼的多彩的霓虹灯字母拼出了句子:“我早就告诉过你。”

“我是听到哈利的声音了吗?”妈妈说。她和爸爸走进了客厅,坐了下来。

“你好唐克斯。你好莱姆斯。泰迪刚才正在跟我讲这个横幅。”

妈妈大笑起来,爸爸呻吟着。

“这是个糟糕的碍眼的东西,就是这样。”爸爸说。

“不,它不是。”妈妈说,“这是对我的胜利的宣示,是我在‘永远正确’宅邸里永恒的荣耀的象征!”

哈利大笑起来:“好吧,考虑到你们在庆祝的事情,我很惊讶这儿居然只有一个横幅。”

“我明白!我觉得我应该多弄几个。”妈妈说。

“不要,一个就够多的了。”爸爸简短地对妈妈说。“不要鼓励她。”他对哈利说。

哈利直起身、对爸爸立起眉毛。“对于她是正确的这一点你肯定不会心情不好吧,莱姆斯?”哈利问,“我以为在这件事情上,比起其他所有事情,你会很高兴被证明是错的呢。”

爸爸笑了:“我非常高兴,哈利。”

“他当然高兴被证明是错的,”妈妈说,“他只是不喜欢以我是对的为代价。”

他们都哈哈大笑。

“你以前见过爸爸是狼的样子吗,哈利?”泰迪问。

房间里的尴尬明显到连四岁的孩子都不会注意不到。

“呃,就一次。”哈利回答。

泰迪环视着表现得很奇怪的大人们。“怎么啦?”他问。

“哦,这个故事不太好,”哈利轻描淡写地说,“完全没有你的故事好,泰迪。听起来你和小绿有个不错的冒险呀。”

“我都还没告诉你我骑上爸爸的事情呢!”泰迪喊道。

爸爸用一只手捂住了脸,妈妈大笑起来。

“那听起来真好玩,泰迪。”哈利说。他尽力绷着脸,脸上抽动着。

“确实是。”泰迪证实道。

“好,泰迪,”爸爸抬起头来,“我觉得有些事情我们需要谈谈。”

他爸爸语气里的严肃让他很惊讶。“什么事?”泰迪问。

“你……泰迪,你不能就这么走来走去、告诉别人我是个狼人。”爸爸说,他看起来不太自在,“你告诉哈利是完全没问题的,当然。但是泰迪,其他人,你不可以告诉他们。”

“为什么?”泰迪问,觉得自己的嘴唇在抖。他没想做任何错事。为什么爸爸看起来这么不自在?为什么他听起来这么难过?

但是妈妈插嘴了,她听起来既不难过也没有不自在。当她说话的时候她的语气是兴奋而且神秘的:“你不能告诉任何人,泰迪,因为这是一个秘密呀!”

泰迪瞪大了眼睛。“一个秘密?”他小声说。

“哦是的泰迪,”哈利说,“这是个特别秘密的秘密,只有像你和我这样特别酷的人才能知道。”

“真的吗?”泰迪看着他爸爸寻求证实。

“是的,泰迪,这是个秘密。”爸爸沉重地说。

“哦,那你为什么不直接说呢?”泰迪问。

“有时候大人会忘记一些事情,宝贝儿,”妈妈说,“别介意,嗯?只要保证你不会告诉任何人,一切就都没问题了。”

“好,我不会说。”泰迪说,“而且我会告诉小绿不要告诉任何人。”

“真棒,”哈利笑着说,“好了,你为什么不给我多讲讲骑你爸爸的事情呢?”

泰迪没看到爸爸给妈妈的那个眼神。“我画了幅画!”泰迪叫道,“想看吗,哈利?”

“当然想!”哈利说。

泰迪跳下了沙发,抓着哈利的手。他拉着哈利出了客厅,到楼上看那些被他和爸爸固定在爸爸妈妈卧室的墙上的画。当他们爬楼梯的时候,他听到了身后的客厅里爸爸妈妈说的话。

“这其实不是个秘密,”爸爸咕哝着,“只不过不是他应该脱口而出的事——”

“我知道,亲爱的,”妈妈回答,“但是四岁孩子不能理解那么微妙的区别,是吧?所以现在,这就是个秘密。”

 

几天后的晚上,泰迪看到他爸爸坐在沙发上看一本书。他自作主张地跳上了沙发,爬到爸爸的大腿上。爸爸看起来并不介意,他笑着把现在看到的那一页做上标记,把书放到一边。

“你好啊,泰迪。”

“爸爸,等我长大了,我想像你一样当个狼人!”

泰迪过了好多年才能够理解他的话在他爸爸心里激起了多么大的恐惧。在那个时候,爸爸保持着相当冷静的神情,但是后来泰迪回想起来才意识到,在爸爸坚忍地紧锁的眉头背后正在进行着一场激烈的战斗。他不想用关于狼人的真相的可怕故事吓到这个如此轻易就接纳了他的男孩。但是与此同时,他的灵魂正在被撕扯着,因为他的儿子——他的漂亮的、健康的儿子——靠着纯粹的奇迹逃脱了折磨他一生的诅咒,却希望得到这个令人畏惧的诅咒。

但是对爸爸来说很幸运的是,妈妈在那里,她快速地救了场。

“你就是个贪心的小家伙(power-hog,没有查到翻译,猜测了一下),你知道吗?”她靠着客厅的门框上,眼睛闪闪发光地开着她儿子的玩笑。“你已经可以把你自己变形成世界上任何人的样子了,你现在还想变成一只狼?给我们其他人留一些魔法吧,行吗?”

泰迪噘着嘴:“可是我想变得像爸爸一样啊!”

妈妈微笑着走进房间,走过来准备坐在他们旁边。“嗯,你当然想变得像你爸爸一样!”她说着坐下来,“你爸爸的确很酷。但是你知道,你已经很像爸爸了,你们俩总是密谋反对我!”她假装怒视着他们,泰迪咯咯地笑了。“重点是,宝贝儿,你有很多方法可以变得像爸爸,那些方法都和狼人没有任何关系,对吧?而且如果你想要在那些方面变得像爸爸一样,那么你就可以变得像爸爸一样。好吧,实际上还是别和爸爸完全一样。一定要努力让自己因为炸飞了霍格沃茨的一座塔楼而差点被开除。”

“我没干过这事。”爸爸不假思索地说。

“嗯哼。”妈妈不相信地说。

“是小天狼星干的。”

“真的吗?”

“那是詹姆的主意。我甚至都不在那儿。”

“这样的话二十五年前可能对老麦格有用,亲爱的,但是在这里的人都不会相信你的话。是吧,泰迪?”

泰迪又笑了,然后摇了摇头。

“你还指责我让他和你作对呢。”爸爸对妈妈说。

“但是我还是想变成狼!”泰迪坚持道。

“不,你不想,泰迪。”爸爸轻声说。但是妈妈看起来在思考。

“唔,如果你真的想变成狼,我觉得那是可能的。”她若有所思地说,无视了她丈夫惊恐的怒视,“但是你不想当狼人,泰迪,”她继续说,“不,你想成为的是一个阿尼马格斯。”

“一个什么?”泰迪问。

“阿尼马格斯是能够随心所欲地变成动物的男巫或女巫。”妈妈解释道,“相信我,这比当狼人好多了。爸爸只能在满月时变身,但是如果你是阿尼马格斯,你想什么时候变成狼都可以,而且你想什么时候变回人就什么时候变。这听起来不是更好吗?

“我猜是吧。”泰迪说,但是他还是噘着嘴。

“很多特别酷的人都是阿尼马格斯,”妈妈继续说,“你爸爸最好的朋友尖头叉子叔叔和大脚板叔叔都是阿尼马格斯。麦格教授是阿尼马格斯,而且她是霍格沃茨的校长!不泰迪,我觉得成为阿尼马格斯是你更想要做的。这样你和爸爸还是可以在满月时一起变成狼。”

泰迪想了想。“好吧,”他同意了,“做个安马格斯听起来挺酷的。”

“这是最酷的。”爸爸鼓励地说。

泰迪现在变得兴奋了些。“我想做个安马格斯!”泰迪在他爸爸的大腿上跳着,“我该怎么做?”

“抱歉泰迪,但是你得等到成年以后才能做。”妈妈说。

“尖头叉子叔叔和大脚板叔叔不是这样……”爸爸低声说。

“这不是重点,莱姆斯,”妈妈打断了他,“泰迪得等到成年以后,这是——哦,怎么说来着——合法的。”

泰迪消沉了起来,又开始噘着嘴。

“别这样,泰迪,”妈妈说,“你现在可能没法变成一只狼,但是你和爸爸还是可以在满月的时候玩得很开心呀。如果你愿意,我可以给你找个球,你就可以教你爸爸捡球了!”

“哈哈。”爸爸毫无笑意地说。

泰迪打了个哈欠。

“该睡觉了。”爸爸说着把泰迪拉进怀里抱着,站了起来。

泰迪闭上眼睛,把头靠在爸爸的肩膀上,被爸爸抱到了床上。他满脑子想着狼人和阿尼马格斯。他决定,他长大以后会做个阿尼马格斯,虽然他的一部分仍然想做个狼人。

因为泰迪第一次看到他爸爸的狼人形态时只有四岁,他不知道那是个诅咒。他不知道那些恨意和恐惧。他不知道魔法部制定的法律。他不知道他妈妈在毯子上施了无声咒来避免泰迪听到他爸爸变形时那极其痛苦的喊叫声。他不知道在狼毒药剂问世之前的那段日子。

不,那个时候泰迪只知道他爱着他的爸爸。他知道他的爸爸是世界上最酷的、最聪明的、最棒的人。他还知道,如果他的爸爸是个狼人,那么成为狼人就是件相当好的事情。

 

END

 

 

(译者的话:小泰迪关于灰色蜡笔的那句话是支撑我翻完全篇的主要动力,萌得不要不要的!莱姆斯就是应该有这样可爱的一个孩子呀。话说我自从考研英语翻译题之后就没碰过这个,总觉得能理解英文但是没法用中文表达出来。所以欢迎各种捉虫或者改进的建议。)

兮笑

【卢唐】Strangers in My Life (Remus/Tonks)

旧文搬运。


<1969年7月30日>


“莱姆斯,你确定你一个人吃早饭可以吗?”

“当然可以。你上班快要迟到了,妈妈。”

“好好,我这就走。今天天气很好,可以出去晒晒太阳。当然,如果你觉得不舒服最好还是上床休息。盘子可以留着我回来再洗,总之千万不要让自己累着,好吗亲爱的?”

“好的,妈妈。”

卢平太太飞快地把头发盘起来,带上帽子,在儿子的脸颊上轻吻一下,然后踩着高跟鞋快步走出家门。

莱姆斯走回餐桌旁边,一个人吃完了盘子里的吐司,把杯子里剩下的牛奶喝干净,然后把盘子和杯子拿到水池里洗。

最后这项工作做起来确实有点吃力。他的肩膀上的伤口才刚刚愈...

旧文搬运。




<1969年7月30日>

 

“莱姆斯,你确定你一个人吃早饭可以吗?”

“当然可以。你上班快要迟到了,妈妈。”

“好好,我这就走。今天天气很好,可以出去晒晒太阳。当然,如果你觉得不舒服最好还是上床休息。盘子可以留着我回来再洗,总之千万不要让自己累着,好吗亲爱的?”

“好的,妈妈。”

卢平太太飞快地把头发盘起来,带上帽子,在儿子的脸颊上轻吻一下,然后踩着高跟鞋快步走出家门。

莱姆斯走回餐桌旁边,一个人吃完了盘子里的吐司,把杯子里剩下的牛奶喝干净,然后把盘子和杯子拿到水池里洗。

最后这项工作做起来确实有点吃力。他的肩膀上的伤口才刚刚愈合,而水池对于9岁的小男孩而言又有点高。但是他不想把盘子留给下班回家以后的妈妈——那个时候的妈妈光是准备晚饭就足够忙碌了,给她增加负担是不对的。

当他终于把盘子擦干净、放回柜子里的时候,他满意地笑了起来。他觉得对于满月后的第二个早上而言,他的表现已经可以令人满意了。

他坐在沙发上,拿起爸爸昨天买回来的小说看了一会儿。暖融融的阳光穿过落地窗,正好落在他的背上,背上那些酸痛的肌肉感觉也好一些了。

由于阳光的味道实在太诱人,他决定听妈妈的建议,出去走一走,至少是在门前的院子里坐一会儿。说实话,他很不喜欢在满月后的那几天里出门,因为那些麻瓜邻居总会同情地盯着他的伤疤。不过这次的伤口都在衣服能遮住的地方,路人可能看到的痕迹只有苍白的脸色,而且周一的上午多数人都忙着工作,门口的街道应该没什么人。综合考虑之后,他觉得这时候出门是安全的。

然而他错了。

他刚走出家门,就看到有个红头发的女人站在他家院子外面,正在研究他家的门牌。他正在犹豫是赶紧躲回去还是迎着那个女人走出去,女人已经注意到了他。她隔着院门打量着他,眼睛瞪得特别大,好像看到了什么不可思议的奇观。

这个时候再躲回家是很不礼貌的,莱姆斯这样说服了自己,然后向前走去。

“请问我能帮助您吗,女士?”他尽可能使自己看起来彬彬有礼。”

“啊,对不起,我想我是迷路了。”对方已经收回了惊讶的表情,但是一双大眼睛仍然在他身上打量,“请问这附近有邮局吗?”

“有。往这边走,过了路口就是。”他指了指右边。

“谢谢。”

“不客气,女士。”

那位女士向邮局的方向走去,走了两步又回过头,冲着莱姆斯露出一个灿烂的笑容。她的红色长发微微飘起来,仿佛在燃烧一样,使他整个人都充满了活力。然后她转过身,大步向前走去。

虽然那天是满月后的第二天,但莱姆斯一直都觉得心情很好,不知道是因为帮助了别人,还是因为那个美丽的笑容。

 

<1976年3月12日>

 

一节漫长的魔法史结束了,詹姆从睡梦中清醒过来,揉了揉乱七八糟的头发,慢吞吞地收拾那些他根本没怎么看过的书本。小天狼星站在过道里催他快点,说自己饿得能吃下一头鹰头马身有翼兽。彼得虽然之前发誓要为了O.W.Ls好好学魔法史,但是还是在半中间就睡着了,现在正在请求莱姆斯晚上回去给他补补课。莱姆斯自然是答应了好友的请求。他在给彼得补习的过程中已经发现了自己对讲课很有兴趣,更何况作为全班唯一一个整节课都保持清醒的人,他算得上是责无旁贷。

掠夺者们一起冲到餐桌前,一边享用美味的午餐一边低声讨论着恶作剧计划。

“……漂浮咒加变形术?你是说就像上次对斯莱特林的餐桌那样?”詹姆对小天狼星的计划大摇其头,“创意啊创意,这才是我们的灵魂。虽然那次的效果确实很好,但是重复是一种耻辱。”

“好吧,那你提一个。”小天狼星对自己的计划被否决毫不介意,兴致勃勃地把手伸向了烤鸡肉。

詹姆似乎还在思考,莱姆斯先开口了:“说真的,你们不觉得最近不是恶作剧的好时机吗?”

“说真的,月亮脸级长,你不会罚我们关禁闭的对不对?”小天狼星冲他探过身子来,笑得很得意。

莱姆斯开玩笑地在他肩膀上推了一把,让他坐回了原位:“最近每天都有魁地奇的训练,詹姆不可以被关禁闭。再说再过三天就是……”

“哦。”詹姆马上就明白了莱姆斯没有说完的话,“那个毛绒绒的小问题。”

小天狼星和彼得也点点头,表示自己明白了。他们前阵子刚刚学成了阿尼马格斯,这个月圆之夜是他们期待已久的第一次集体“变身”,确实是绝对不能被关禁闭的时期。所以最后他们决定去看格兰芬多的魁地奇训练,然后就老老实实地回宿舍。

 

不幸的是,那天下午一直在下大雨。因为比赛临近,格兰芬多的训练当然还是要进行。三个掠夺者坐在看台上瑟瑟发抖。

训练还未结束的时候,一个今年新入队的找球手不小心摔下了扫帚。作为看台上仅有的观众,他们三个知道自己应该负责把这个头破血流的三年级生送到医务室。

莱姆斯正要站起来,小天狼星按住了他,语气强硬地说:“我们去就行了。”

莱姆斯看向彼得,后者用力点点头。于是他顺从地坐了回去,看着他的朋友们离开。他知道朋友们是担心他在月圆之前的身体不适。这种担心和照顾曾经让他觉得有点丢脸,然而现在的他已经能怀着纯粹的感激之情接受这份善意了——就和接受自己父母的担心和照顾一样。这些男孩不仅是他的朋友,也是他的家人。

训练继续在风雨中进行,似乎永远都不会结束。莱姆斯把目光从飞得太高以至于几乎看不清的詹姆身上移开,忽然发现不知何时开始有个女生坐在自己的斜后方。莱姆斯很惊讶,因为这个女生看起来和他年纪相仿,金发碧眼的样子又十分显眼,但他并不认识,所以显然她不是个格兰芬多。这个的天气里来看别的学院的练习?这个女生一定是魁地奇的狂热爱好者吧。

虽然有着三个热爱魁地奇的朋友,但是莱姆斯自己对魁地奇的兴趣一直都比较有限。并不是说他不会在格兰芬多队——特别是詹姆——进球的时候大声欢呼,只不过他更愿意在坐在火炉边的地毯上玩一局巫师棋。

女生连着打了两个喷嚏。莱姆斯回头看她。她冲着莱姆斯尴尬地笑了笑。莱姆斯这才注意到她穿的长袍比较薄。而现在还是春寒料峭的时节,更不要提这疯狂的大雨了。他抬起手解开了自己的长袍,脱下来,然后递给对方。

“如果不介意的话,请用吧。”他礼貌地说。

女生笑着接过去,漂亮的眸子似乎闪闪发光:“谢谢。”

莱姆斯转过身继续看向球场。这时他才意识到,脱下长袍使他把毛衣直接暴露在了女生的视野里。而这件毛衣背后正好有一个该死的补丁。在朋友面前袒露真相是一回事,在陌生人——而且还是一个这么漂亮的女生,他诚实地补充——面前展现自己的贫穷,就是另一回事了。

现在做什么也来不及了,他就那么僵硬地坐到了训练结束,直到有人碰他的肩膀,他才回过神来。

“谢谢你的衣服。”她的声音听起来不仅很真诚而且很亲切,这让莱姆斯觉得就算她看到了那个补丁都没关系了。

“不客气。”他说完,就站在那里看着那个女生快步向楼梯走去。她好像在楼梯中间的某个地方绊了一下,因为莱姆斯听到了一声小小的“哎呦”。他赶紧跑下楼梯,但是一直跑到楼梯底端都没有看到任何人。他环顾四周,除了远处的魁地奇队员以外,风雨中的球场空荡荡的。

莱姆斯把长袍穿回去,发现身上带了些淡淡的香水味。不像是同年级的女生们喜欢用的那种热烈的花香,反倒和她妈妈用的那种味道有点像,有种成熟的感觉。莱姆斯感觉自己的耳朵一定变红了。千万不能被他们三个发现了,他暗想,这个足够他们笑三天了。

 

<1985年12月24日>

 

向一起工作的几个工人道别之后,莱姆斯走出工厂,向着城郊的方向走去。

他在路边的小商店里买了一瓶啤酒。其实他更想来一杯火焰威士忌,但是他工作和居住的地方是一个麻瓜小镇,他也没有幻影移形到霍格莫德去的心情。

哦,霍格莫德,这个词在他脑海里几乎是陌生的。他有两三年没有去过那里了。实际上他有两三年没有和任何巫师或者巫师城镇有过接触了(也许要除去狼人管制局的工作人员)。原因有很多:第一,他很难在巫师的社会找到工作;第二,他也没有什么巫师朋友可以去拜访(除了他的父亲和霍格沃茨的校长,但是他并不想去打扰他们);第三,置身于巫师之中会勾起他对过去的回忆(虽然这些回忆并不全是痛苦的,但是他还是习惯于离它们远一些)。

莱姆斯最近的收入已经比他刚开始工作的时候好多了。虽然为了避免被人怀疑,他从来不能在任何职位上长期做下去,但是他已经能找到比较适合自己的麻瓜工作了——比如说成为流水线上的一名细心工作的工人,或者一个图书馆管理员。作为一个登记在册的狼人,他宁愿选择麻瓜工作,至少他的同事们不会用畏缩的眼神看着他。

半路上,天空开始飘起雪花。他透过路边人家的落地窗看到了一棵硕大的圣诞树,这才第一次有了圣诞节的实感。他前几天对圣诞节的感觉仅限于工厂会放假,节日本身对他非但没什么意义,反而平添烦恼——他不知道该怎么过这个漫长的晚上,邻居家传来的歌声只会让他更加清晰地意识到自己是孤身一人。

就在他想着把椅子变形成圣诞树来凑合一晚上的时候,一个个子很高挑的姑娘从右手边一家服装店里走了出来。不知为何她一直在盯着莱姆斯看。她看起来二十岁左右的样子,留着黑色的短发,穿着一件长款的黑色呢子大衣,大衣口袋里好像有什么东西。等等,那里露出了一小截魔杖的手柄……

莱姆斯下意识地握住了自己口袋里的魔杖。

“嗨!”那个姑娘冲他打招呼,“圣诞快乐!”

“圣诞快乐。”莱姆斯干巴巴地回答,手并没有离开自己的魔杖。这会是魔法部针对狼人的某种行动吗?不,不太可能。他看不出最近有让他们这样做的理由,而且这个姑娘的笑容也很自然。但是莱姆斯总是很谨慎。

对方向前走了两步,几乎是站在了他身边。她悄声说:“想不想来杯火焰威士忌?”

莱姆斯几乎就要拔出魔杖指着对方了,不过他能感受到街道对面的两个路人的目光。他无论如何也不能在麻瓜面前这样做。

小姑娘的黑眼睛里闪着恶作剧的光彩,似乎对他的震惊很满意:“我觉得这句话可以作为巫师在麻瓜城镇的接头暗号,你说呢?”

“你是怎么……”

“我当然知道你是个巫师,因为我在霍格沃茨的时候见过你。你当过格兰芬多的级长对不对?”

“……对。”除了这个字以外,莱姆斯根本想不出他还能说什么。

“我在赫奇帕奇,比你低四个年级,不过你和你的朋友们在全校都足够有名了。话说你可以不用攥着你的魔杖了,”她举起双手,做了个懒散的投降的姿势,“我只是路过这里然后逛一下服装店而已。”

“那么你为什么会在平安夜来一个麻瓜城镇呢?”

“我来这里找一个朋友一起过节——我是个混血,总会有几个麻瓜朋友的——然后非常不幸地发现他已经搬家了,而且没有人知道他搬到哪里去了。然后我用逛街来发泄我的气愤和消磨我的时间。现在我正准备找个没人的地方幻影移形回家。也许我命中注定就该一个人的平安夜吧。”

莱姆斯被她语气里那种生动的无奈感逗乐了。他不知不觉已经松开了魔杖,带着笑意说:“如果你不介意的话,一起去霍格莫德怎么样?”

“火焰威士忌?当然好!”

他们一起出现在霍格莫德,然后在猪头酒吧的一个角落里坐下。他检查了自己的钱包,确定自己还有足够的银西可来买两个人的酒。那个小姑娘——莱姆斯现在知道她叫做安娜——把自己的钱递给他,但是他拒绝了。

“你请我?”安娜问。虽然语气很惊讶,但是莱姆斯从她的眼神里看得出,她完全不惊讶。

“当然。”

他走到吧台买回了两杯酒。他们一边喝一边聊着一些无关紧要的事情,多数是和霍格沃茨有关的。这个比自己小四岁的学妹居然知道很多掠夺者的事迹,这让莱姆斯很惊讶。特别是有些事情他自己都快忘记了。正如安娜说的那样,小天狼星五年级时确实在格兰芬多的男生浴室里放过一个遇水就会爆炸的烟火,莱姆斯很不幸地成为了那个触发了烟火的人,并且因此得到了诡异的发型。但是他一直以为这是他们四个之间的秘密,真没想到这个小恶作剧会传到赫奇帕奇的一年级的耳朵里(一定是当时在浴室门口笑得直不起腰的詹姆传出去的,莱姆斯愤愤地想)。安娜对詹姆似乎不是很感兴趣,因为她讲的多数以小天狼星为主,剩下的往往和莱姆斯自己密切相关。莱姆斯以为自己不愿意想起这些事情,因为短暂的欢乐回忆之后,他总是不可避免地想到他们全部都不在了这个事实。然而聊着聊着,他发现自己心里只有快乐和怀念。

“……莱姆斯?你在听吗?”安娜用自己的杯子碰了碰他的杯子,清脆的响声使他回过神来。

“抱歉,我走神了。”

“我在问你呢。你现在一个人住在刚才那个小镇吗?”

莱姆斯点点头。

安娜脸上露出了担忧的神色:“对不起,我说他们的事情是不是让你难过了?毕竟他们,呃……”

“不,没关系,我很感谢你让我想起了这些事情。他们虽然都不在了,但是至少有人记得他们最好的那段岁月,不管他们后来变成了什么样子……我不知道怎么表达,总之我很高兴。”

安娜笑了,大声说着“干杯”,然后把杯子里最后的威士忌一饮而尽。

“安娜,有件事情我很好奇,可以问问你吗?”莱姆斯压低了声音说,“你刚才谈到小天狼星。你听起来并不厌恶或者惧怕他。”

对面的小姑娘好像被这个问题吓到了。她忽然就脸红了,飞快地移开目光,好像对桌布上的洞产生了强烈的兴趣。

莱姆斯恍然大悟。他轻笑着说:“哦!小天狼星的魅力。我都快忘了那些拿着迷情剂追着他满地跑的小女生们了。”

“我才不会做那种傻事!”安娜抗议道,“不过我承认他很有魅力。”

“他确实是。老实说,我以前有点羡慕他,因为他有那么多我得不到的。比如说他有几十个的追求者,我知道将来一定会有一个很棒的姑娘成为他的新娘……当然,现在已经不可能了。”他苦笑着补充道。

“不对。”

莱姆斯挑起眉,发现对面的小姑娘脸上并没有玩笑的神色。他觉得不可思议。这个姑娘难道是要追到阿兹卡班和他结婚吗?

“你将来也会得到的。你将来也会有一个很棒的新娘。”安娜信誓旦旦地说。

莱姆斯不知道该不该去反驳她,毕竟人家只是好意,而且他还没准备好和刚认识的人谈论自己的“情况”。安娜毫无疑问是个好人,但是莱姆斯不知道她是否好到能接受桌子对面是个狼人的地步。从他仅有的一次恋爱经验来看,答案很可能是否定的——他在七年级时对已经和自己约会半年之久的女朋友说了自己的“情况”,而这件事以莱姆斯给她施了个遗忘咒为结尾。

于是他只是简单地说:“谢谢你的安慰。”

“不是安慰,我是真的知道。因为我——对了,我占卜学得很好!O.W.Ls的时候我的占卜得了E呢。”她的口气听起来像是向家长汇报成绩的五年级生。

莱姆斯噗嗤一声笑出来。安娜是如此急切地希望他能相信,甚至找出了这种理由,这实在是很有趣。

“你没有要求看我的手掌,好像也没有带着水晶球,另外我也没有喝茶。现在霍格沃茨已经开始教学生看着火焰威士忌来占卜了吗?”

安娜大笑起来:“你的空杯子只能告诉我一件事——你可能有点醉了。”

莱姆斯的酒量确实不大,但是后来他们还是各自又要了一杯黄油啤酒。喝完之后,安娜建议他们在醉得没法幻影移形之前离开这儿,莱姆斯同意了。回到家以后的事情莱姆斯有点记不清了,大概是穿着衣服和鞋直接上床睡觉了吧。

第二天早上醒来以后,他盯着天花板想了很久,都不能确定昨晚是不是一场梦。

那天之后,他开始时不时去霍格莫德逛一逛,在蜂蜜公爵买一点巧克力,或者在三把扫帚喝一杯啤酒,或者只是站在那里看一看来来往往的学生们,和偶尔碰到的教授们聊聊天。巫师的世界忽然就不再那么让他抵触了。

不过可惜的是,他和安娜似乎缺点缘分,他没有再见到过她。

 

<199775日>


“我本来已经可以下班了……”唐克斯小声嘀咕着,一路小跑穿过走廊。

她本来确实已经可以下班回家了——为了能早点回家和莱姆斯商量婚礼的事情,她整整一天都在卖力地处理那些文书工作,就是为了能早一点回去。可是刚才她路过禁止滥用魔法司的时候,劳拉正好从里面走出来。劳拉是她在霍格沃茨的同学,有着一头柔顺的火红色长发,漂亮地不可思议。然而此时的她却顶着一头乱发,似乎很久没有注意过自己的印象了。

“嘿,劳拉!你头发怎么了?”

劳拉转过头,激动地一把抓住她的手:“唐克斯!你现在是不是没事?太好了,你能帮我把这个送到九层吗?”

劳拉的另一只手里抓着一卷羊皮纸和一个生锈的怀表。

“九层?神秘事务司?你什么时候换到那个部门了?”

“我没有换部门!这是我们前两天没收的东西,有个疯疯癫癫的老头子总是喜欢发明这种危险的东西。可是我们办公室里人来人往的,不能把这东西放在这儿,我们头儿说只有九层适合保存它……拜托你唐克斯,我快忙死了。”

唐克斯同情地看了一眼她的头发:“好吧,给我吧。反正我也要去八层用飞路网,挺顺路的。”

于是她就开始替劳拉跑腿了。站在电梯里,她有点好奇地看了一眼手里的怀表。劳拉警告她千万不要打开这个玩意。作为一个傲罗,唐克斯当然不会傻到去打开一个被魔法法律执行司没收的东西,更何况她马上就要结婚了,她不希望有任何意外发生在自己身上。

哦,结婚!想到这个词都让唐克斯觉得开心。再过一周,她就可以成为尼法朵拉·卢平了!虽然这会是一个小型的婚礼(除了唐克斯的父母,他们只打算邀请几个凤凰社的朋友),但是无论如何它都是一个婚礼。他们准备今晚给朋友们发请柬。

邓布利多的葬礼已经过去几天了,但大家都士气低落,就连总是充满欢声笑语的陋居似乎都陷入了某种低气压之中。她和莱姆斯手牵手从葬礼回来以后,莱姆斯装作一切正常的样子,但是唐克斯知道邓布利多的死对于他的影响比对于唐克斯要大很多。所以当唐克斯提出尽快举行婚礼的时候他并不同意,他说他完全没有那个心情。唐克斯最后还是说服了他。毕竟他们都希望一场婚礼能让他们自己和凤凰社的大家都感到一点欢乐,或者说一点绝望中的希望。

哦,莱姆斯。他今天应该是去挑选戒指了。虽然他没有告诉唐克斯,但是唐克斯就是知道,毕竟这对她来说太明显了:莱姆斯今天没有凤凰社的任务,但是他还是早早就起床了;他吃早饭的时候显得心不在焉,一开始差点把他自己那根可爱的柏木魔杖当成叉子用,然后整个早上一直盯着唐克斯的手看。很显然,他是在考虑戒指的大小,同时也非常担心戒指的价格。唐克斯很想直接告诉他,即使他拿一个铁片弯成的指环来都没问题,但是她当然没有这么说。她知道他很在意这些事。她不想再来一遍那些关于“太老、太穷”的争论了。一周以后的婚礼一定会很顺利的,什么都不会阻止她嫁给这个男人。

九层到了。唐克斯大步走出电梯,然后就被自己的脚绊倒了。

她无奈地撑着地站起来,准备捡起掉了的东西。那个怀表就躺在前面的地面上,它的盖子——劳拉说绝对不能打开的——已经打开了。里面的数字已经看不清了,因为它正在发出强烈的刺眼的白光。

“天哪……”唐克斯下意识地闭上眼睛,握紧了自己的魔杖。

希望我还能平平安安地和莱姆斯结婚吧。在被白光吞没的一刻,她绝望地想。

 

当白光和令人眩晕的耳鸣都消退以后,唐克斯睁开眼,发现自己站在一条很安静的街道上。街上没有人,两边都是很普通的带小院的民居。从小院里的一辆汽车来看,这里应该是个麻瓜社区。

唐克斯飞快地把自己的长袍脱掉,露出一身麻瓜衣服——短袖T恤和牛仔长裤。她给长袍施了个缩小咒,然后把它放进裤子口袋里。保险起见,她还改变了自己的相貌。她想着劳拉的脸和她火红的头发——毕竟这是她当时能想到的第一个人。

她怀疑劳拉给她的是一个门钥匙,但是她很确定自己刚才没有那种肚脐眼被钩住的感觉。傲罗的训练告诉她,在不明情况的时候进行幻影移形是很危险的,她决定先看看这究竟是什么地方。

她向前走了一段路,忽然被右手边的门牌吸引了注意力。那里清清楚楚地写着“Lupin”。

这会是个巧合吗?

正在她思考的时候,院子里传来脚步声,一个小男孩打开房门走了出来。

唐克斯发现自己正在和一张莱姆斯童年时期的照片面对面。他看起来和照片里一样羞怯安静,似乎还比照片更加苍白瘦弱一些。看来这是满月前后……不对,这不是重点。重点是,她回到了过去,见到了她缩小版的未婚夫!

看来那个旧怀表不是个门钥匙,而是个时间转换器。

“请问我能帮助您吗,女士?”小莱姆斯用稚嫩的嗓音说道。

“啊,对不起,我想我是迷路了……” 唐克斯随口说道。

显然她不能直接冲上去喊他的名字然后告诉他自己是他的未婚妻——她不太懂时间的法则之类的东西,但是她既不想被对方当成疯子、也不想让对方被吓成疯子。这时候她的傲罗训练又一次起了作用。作为隐蔽和伪装的最高分获得者,她很快地进入了自己所伪装的角色。

 

唐克斯转身走向莱姆斯所指的邮局的方向时,忍不住又回头看了他一眼。

真可爱。她暗自想着。不过他看起来最多十岁,难道我要等他长大、等他二十年吗?万一这中间他爱上了别人怎么办?不对,既然这是过去,那么他将来是会爱上我的。不对,他将来会爱上的“我”不是这个我呀……

正在她漫无边际地思考的时候,那种令人眩晕的耳鸣又开始了,她知道又有什么要发生了……

 

这一次她出现在一个很熟悉的地方:霍格沃茨的魁地奇球场的看台上。天气很冷而且在下雨,她哆嗦了一下,赶紧把长袍拿出来穿上。

她有一种感觉,这一次莱姆斯也在附近。果然,她没怎么费劲就找到了他,因为看台上只有一个人。她正准备走过去,忽然意识到自己的相貌还是二十多岁的劳拉,于是立刻变成十五六岁的样子(这次她选择了她在霍格沃茨的另一个朋友索菲亚的相貌)……

 

本来她准备在魁地奇训练结束以后跟着莱姆斯回到城堡里聊聊天什么的,结果就在她把长袍还给莱姆斯的时候,那种熟悉的耳鸣又来了。她只好尽快跑下楼梯,尽管她知道自己迟早是要绊倒的。

她果然在半路上绊了一下,还没等她重新站起来,耳鸣就吞没了她的意识。

 

她发现自己坐在一家服装店的地板上,左面是店门,右面是一大排衣服——非常老旧的麻瓜款式。面前的一个老太太正在关切地看着她。

“孩子,你没事吧?真是太抱歉了。那个新来的女仆总是把地板弄得太滑,我就说会有人摔倒的……”

“没关系,我每天都会在各种地方摔倒。”唐克斯对着那个似乎是店主的老太太笑了笑,站了起来。

“哦天哪,你这穿的是什么?”老太太伸出戴着手套的手,指着她的长袍,“小姑娘们的喜好我真是越来越不懂了。”

“呃,我正要去朋友家参加化装舞会,所以我穿得像个女巫。”唐克斯面不改色地说。

“今天是平安夜,又不是万圣节,现在的年轻人呀……”老太太摇了摇头,又打量了一下唐克斯的衣服,“可是你不冷吗?我们店里有很多适合小姑娘穿的大衣。”

“朋友家就在不远处。我只是想进来随便看看、消磨时间。”唐克斯说。其实她很冷,而且她透过窗户看到外面正在下雪,不过她身上没有麻瓜钱币(更何况即使她有,她的钱币对老太太来说也很可能是未来的东西),而且她有更方便的办法可以获得大衣。

老太太正准备劝说她买一件大衣,里屋有客人叫她过去,于是她无奈地离开了。

唐克斯马上开始行动。她仔细看了旁边挂着的一件黑色大衣,然后拿出魔杖把自己的长袍变成了那个样子。她照了照穿衣镜,觉得索菲亚的发色和年龄都不适合这件衣服,于是稍稍闭着眼睛想了一下,镜子里看着她的就变成一个有着黑色短发、黑色眼睛的年轻女子了。然后她赶紧走出店门,毕竟她不想让老太太以为她偷了她的衣服。

唐克斯毫不惊讶地看到莱姆斯向她的方向走过来,这次是二十多岁版的。他的棕发中已经开始有了灰发,但是比唐克斯第一次见到他的时候已经少多了。一开始他完全沉浸在自己的思绪中,然后他看到了唐克斯,不知为何显得很警惕。

哪里有问题?唐克斯回想了自己刚才照镜子的样子。该死,她的魔杖好像露出来了!一个伪装成麻瓜的巫师当然会让别人觉得奇怪。

唐克斯其实希望能和过去的莱姆斯聊聊天,但是第一次唐克斯太过震惊、第二次时间又太过短暂,她希望这一次可以实现。现在聊天还没开始,她自己就因为一点小纰漏而就变成了莱姆斯戒备的对象,这可不是个好兆头。

加油,唐克斯。她对自己说。那个是莱姆斯,是你的未婚夫,你知道他的一切,所以你总有办法让他信任你的。

唐克斯深吸一口气,大声说:“嗨!圣诞快乐!”

 

这一次他们终于可以坐下来好好说话了。为了显示自己对掠夺者的无所不知,她绞尽脑汁回忆起了小天狼星和莱姆斯(当然,主要是小天狼星)对她说过的所有趣事。可能是关于小天狼星的事情说得过多,让莱姆斯很好奇她对那个臭名昭著的囚犯为何毫不厌恶。唐克斯当时有点慌张了,她甚至没有心思运用易容马格斯的能力来掩饰脸上的红晕。幸好莱姆斯完全误解了她的神情,还以为她暗恋小天狼星。暗恋自己的舅舅,梅林的胡子啊,唐克斯在心里笑了起来。

唐克斯想告诉他,你最好的朋友、我的舅舅他不是个叛徒,但是她当然不能说。

他们喝完两杯酒的时候,两人都醉了。唐克斯感觉自己又开始耳鸣了,于是她提出现在就回家。她记得的最后一件事是莱姆斯幻影移形的声音……

 

她又一次坐在地板上,不过这次是在她知道的地方——神秘事务司。那个怀表就在她的面前,现在它的盖子是合上的。

她在那里坐了一会。一方面是因为酒精让她有点头晕,另一方面,终于回到了原来的时间这一点让她感到巨大的安慰。

她拿起怀表旁边的羊皮纸,那是劳拉为这个怀表写的报告。她熟练地跳过那些公式性的话,找到了重点:“……新型时间转换器,或者称为时空转换器更为确切……主要功能是把使用者带到他或她打开怀表时所想的人的过去(由于还是半成品,时间点是随机的),但是无法长期停留。具有进行大跨度时间和空间跨越的能力……”

这东西确实应该被送到这里。连普通的时间转换器都应该在魔法部的监控之下,这种随机进行大尺度的跨越的鬼东西更是危险。

“该死的劳拉……”她为什么不给它施个咒让盖子没法打开?!

不过幸好她打开盖子时想的是莱姆斯,幸好她好好地回来了。她现在只想赶快回家,看看自己的未婚夫是不是也好好地在家里等她。

 

唐克斯从自家壁炉里跨出来,一眼就看到莱姆斯正在餐厅里踱步。

“朵拉!”莱姆斯露出松了一口气的表情,“下班时间已经过去半个多小时了,我还以为你出了什么事。金斯莱说你早就走了……天哪,朵拉,怎么了?你喝酒了?”

唐克斯直接扑进了他的怀里,闷声闷气地问:“今天是1997年7月5日?”

“当然。亲爱的,你一定是醉了。”莱姆斯眼睛里带着笑意。

“莱姆斯,你会娶我,对不对?”

“当然,当然。”莱姆斯轻柔地摸了摸她的头发,“你知道我不会反悔的。我爱你,朵拉。”

“我也爱你,莱姆斯。”

唐克斯仰起头,吻住了莱姆斯。她终于感觉自己真正回到了1997年。 


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欢迎评论。我已经尽量避免涉及time-turner的bug了,不过可能还是有╮(╯▽╰)╭

之前发在微博,最近启用LOFTER之后看到卢唐tag如此少有点难过,就搬了这篇脑洞大开的旧文过来。其实我觉得打这个tag本身就有点泄底了,真矛盾呀 ╮(╯▽╰)╭

晨在川流上
哈利波特里超喜欢的角色 可以变...

哈利波特里超喜欢的角色 可以变成任何人 酷 (≖‿≖)✧【临摹的是在Deviantart上看到的插画 格林童话风喔

哈利波特里超喜欢的角色 可以变成任何人 酷 (≖‿≖)✧【临摹的是在Deviantart上看到的插画 格林童话风喔

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